I probably wouldn't be as upset with her if I didn't sleep with her. That's a good point. I had just felt that had she told me upfront, in the beginning, that she had been with him, it would have been more forthcoming and honest. . Had she done so and if she called it rape, she would have had my complete understanding and support. Maybe it wasn't my business in that I was prying and nosey. I don't know. I do love her. I was in love with when I was 12, as ridiculous as that sounds. I really was.
Some of the link you sent does apply to me. I have a tendency to try and "repair" things based upon whatever inadequacy I have perhaps. It would be so hard to step back now. I'm not sure she would want that either. Codependency with her husband extending so far and no end in sight is probably a good reason for me to step back. There is no doubt she sees me as her Knight, and perhaps subconsciously I see myself as that too.