Originally Posted by mycounseling-site.com
A passive aggressive individual doesn't exhibit outward anger or appear malicious. At first glance, the behavior appears to be unassuming, gracious and benevolent; hence the term "Passive-Aggressive". When dealing with a passive-agressive person, one can feel frustrated, offended, guilty or confused. While not intended, you may leave the encounter thinking you did something wrong, but aren't quite sure what it was.
Whether personal or professional, many relationships will come across this inconsistent behavioral pattern. It's very confusing, and often thought of as "crazy-making". This is because the purpose of passive-aggressive behavior is to express negative feelings and resentments in an unassertive and passive way.
Surprisingly, the passive-aggressive person isn't aware of this. Their intent is not to be offensive or frustrating. In their eyes, all they want to do is be helpful.
The problem lies in the fact that this form of helpfulness is better known as codependency. This means the help comes with a price - an expectation of appreciation for the unrequested favor, and moodiness or resentment if you don't.