I still honestly think you're being an insensitive prick.
I don't fault you for wanting oral.
But I do fault you in trying to pry it out of a girl who was "incestually" face raped.
Just the very act of putting that in her mouth could bring back those feelings of guilt, disgust, humiliation, violation, fear. Talk about a mood killer.
I think you should consider breaking up with this girl if no oral is a deal breaker for you. She owes you nothing in this regard, and you should expect nothing.