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I will mishanya, whatever comes of this will be for the better. No matter what it is. Ugh, I'm still preparing for all this. To be honest.. the thing I'm afraid of most.. is losing my daughter, she is everything to me and even though I love my bf i could get over a break-up, I could never get over losing my daughter!!! But whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger right??
you wont lose her!!! if he can't change a diaper, then why would he fight you for her? any guy who is selfish enough to take days off to go hunting and buy a gun when he should be saving for your ring is too selfish to take sole custody of a child. there are all kinds of programs out there for single moms - is there any family that you could stay with temporarily?
Please don't hit me Shh! I'll be good, I promise! Honest cub scouts promise...
Good luck Rosebud. Umm, just don't go in with all guns blazing, with ultimatums and so on. Go with a proposition and see how he reacts. If it gets intense don't build up the pressure and depart gracefully (Prepare for another session). I think the purpose here is to get him to recognise you as his better half and stop holding back on love for his family. But then again, I am so inexperienced with these things, just trying to unsuccessfully picture myself in his shoes. Shh! kicks my butt in advice giving!
i am sorry if that sounded too negative. i know you love him and he probably still cares about you too. i think it sounds like he needs to realize how upset he would be without you. he definitely takes you for granted. the only way to change that is for him to experience life without you. he cant miss you if he thinks everything is fine except for your "bitching"
well it's differnet when it comes to his daughter. i do get what your saying but he would fight tooth and nail for her. he even told me joking around awhile back that he would take her and go to mexico (he has close family there) and I never found that joke funny so it's been in my head all along. trust me he would fight for our daughter no matter what.
oh no mish, i don't give ultamatums to him becasue I always lose those anyways. I will just tell him how I feel and be very sympathetic.. it's the only way I do it!!! Don't worry I'm not some crazy woman who will just start yelling at him although I have felt like I need to at times.. I'll be ok. Thanks guys! I needed all this!
Dont worry Rosebud, if he takes her to Mexico the LF Possee will head on down there and lay the smack down....America style.
Routine = Bordem
No I don't. I lack your patience. And I don't hit, but I might be talked into spanking... ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Mishanya
Ouch! The foxy lady has spoken... The heat is on ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by shh!
You won't lose her, Rosebud.
lol, well i appreciate the fact that Lf would help if anything happened! At least somebody's got my back!!!
Well surprisingly things worked out pretty good last night. We talked and talked and I told him all my feelings again. He said he loved me very much and that things have just been hard for him lately. We talked about everything and was very open with each other. He did agree that he has taken me for granted and that I didn't deserve it, and he was going to do better. And then we set a goal for ourselves, we set a date and year for us to get married. It gives us both enough time to save the money we need and plan for the things we want. We are also going to do all the things that I thought of before to ge the spark back which is a good thing. I feel about at least him knowing where I was comign from and being able to tal to him. But time will only tell if he truly understands all of what I have said. he did go out of his way to do things for me last night and today so I know he listened a little bit!! LOL
And about my daughter, I know my family would do anything for me especially my oldest brother if it came down to it and I would like to think my bf would never do anything like that knowing him and knowing how I am but Iw ouldn't know until I actually went through it. Hopefully I will never have to experience that situation.
Thank you guys very much!!! I know this is far from over but you all have helped me very much and I want to say thank you!!!
Sounds great! I hope things all workout to the plan you two decided.
LOL, me too. I know I have a lot of things to work out on my own but I think I have accpeted the fact that if it happens it happens, and if not then ok.
Thanks Junsui!
I'm glad things are looking positive Rosebud :)Quote:
Originally Posted by Rosebud
Now, announce the time and date to the world! Not only will you get a lot of hugs from people, but it will also make it hard to postpone the wedding if someone decides to change mind...
I have seen people completely change their attitidue and outlook once married for the better and I'm hoping it will be you two! I think the problems are far from over and you should go in with the expectation that there will be more than a few. But like I said earlier, problems are there to help you grow so take them with a positive outlook...
P.S. Oh and if you find a cure that stops people from taking others for granted, please let me know ;)
well thank mish! And I already started telling people. haha I told my mom today and then I mentioned it to one of my friends who has a very large mouth. I ahven't gotten to the rest of them yet but I will, I thought of that as well.
As to the part for taking people for granted, in my case it was becasue I was at home and he didn't think I did much. So what we decided was that his next day off we are switching spots. I'm going to go to a volunteer thing with a friend on that day and he is going to stay home with our daughter and not call me for anything.. he has to take care of it all and when I come home I'm not going to help he will still have to do everything until it's time for him to sleep. This way he can see in my eyes even if it is for one day. SO on that note, I will tell you how that works out for me...