My boyfriend doesn't kiss me

I'm trying to understand why my boyfriend won't kiss me, and trying to not go crazy with frustration over it. He and I have been together for a couple of months and are still getting to know each other. Our sexual chemistry is off the charts, and the few times we have kissed at length have been amazing. He's an incredible kisser (though I'm of the opinion that you can only be as good a kisser as the person you're kissing!) and I could kiss him all day/night long. He doesn't kiss during sex, and really not at any time.

We both have meticulous hygiene and use mouthwash consistently, so it's not about bad breath or anything. I asked him directly last night, "Why don't you like to kiss me?" and he said "I just don't think about it. It doesn't occur to me." Then I asked him if kissing turns him on, and he said, "Sure, a little bit, I guess."

Guys, can you share some insight here? Am I going to have to get used to life without kissing? I'm not sure I can stand it. I love to kiss, and I especially love to kiss HIM. Is there anything I can do that might get him to kiss me more?

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Originally Posted by jen's mind [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I'm trying to understand why my boyfriend won't kiss me, and trying to not go crazy with frustration over it.
He and I have been together for a couple of months and are still getting to know each other. Our sexual chemistry is off the charts,
and the few times we have kissed at length have been amazing. He's an incredible kisser (though I'm of the opinion that you can only
be as good a kisser as the person you're kissing!) and I could kiss him all day/night long. He doesn't kiss during sex, and really not at any time.

We both have meticulous hygiene and use mouthwash consistently, so it's not about bad breath or anything. I asked him directly
last night, "Why don't you like to kiss me?" and he said "I just don't think about it. It doesn't occur to me.
" Then I asked him if kissing turns him on, and he said, "Sure, a little bit, I guess."

Guys, can you share some insight here? Am I going to have to get used to life without kissing? I'm not sure I can stand it.
I love to kiss, and I especially love to kiss HIM. Is there anything I can do that might get him to kiss me more?

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Who initiates the kiss? If you want to kiss him, maybe you should do it unexpected and see how he reacts.
Have you told him that you liked to do that?
Some guys just want to get action and deploy without setting up.
It depends on his personality and how he deals with situations like this, unless you talk about it, he won't think It's such a big deal.

I don't know.

I loved kiss my ex gf. When we woke up, when we went to bed, when we were just sitting there, when we were out somewhere, and especially when we were having sex.

my gut is asking..why would he not want to kiss u???? so my question is do u think that he does really fancy u? observe him....does he seem to react to anyone else? friends etc.....watch closely...he might like someone close to u or he might be gay and doesnt want to expose this to anyone...its quite strange....i have no real insight really other than that....to me a kiss is the best part because its usually the first initial contact and starts the electricity....im a girl so i dunno what guys think about kissing...i always assumed that guys luved to kiss?

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my gut is asking..why would he not want to kiss u????

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Exactly. What am I to think?

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im a girl so i dunno what guys think about kissing...i always assumed that guys luved to kiss?

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Me too, on both counts.

I can say definitively that he is NOT gay, and that he fancies me enough that we've spent the last six weeks together. He met my sister when we took a weekend trip to her house, and even met my parents when we met up with them at a sporting event (got on great with my dad, too.) We're going to the city for an event this weekend and he's taking me to meet all of his closest friends from the old neighborhood. All of his family lives out of state, but he's told his parents about me and had me speak with each of his three brothers on the phone. He's extremely genuine and would have readily avoided any and all of the above if he wasn't into me.

This is truly a first... I've never encountered anything like this before. It's messing with my head! I appreciate the input... at least I know I'm not bugging out for no reason.

It is kind of weird. Every guy I've dated has loved to kiss. I don't think it's you though. Must be some weird aversion he has to it.

So the question is: Is this something you can live with if it doesn't change? Is this a deal-breaker for you?

I think, his having a concentration when your doing it...
Some guys cant focus or do the same things at the same time.
Try to plan kissing him only no bed scenes. That will do,... if ever he can't resist doin, then search some videos that can do kissing while having ***.

Try making and embed to your email.if your a card lover make it there.

How about you start kissing him first? It may be that you're always waiting for him to do it?

No idea about it.
As far as I know, guys love to kiss.

Maybe the word kiss is not in his vocabulary.
Or maybe he's not used to it.:emot125::emot159:

im not really the 'kissing' type... its not that i dont like it, or i have bad hygene [in fact its probably on the better side of most given i have ocd]... it just 'doesn't occur to me'.

dont get me wrong, theres nothing better than a good kiss from my girl, but i suppose if were just sat watchin tv or chilling out, im much happier just holding her and being with her... what more do i want than than!!

[plus, its hard to watch th football and kiss!]

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Originally Posted by psydex [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

[plus, its hard to watch the football and kiss!]

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Man I would rather kiss then watch football.

This is similer to my problem... except with my gf. She is a awsome kisser but we just don't kiss anymore. I kiss her a lot so I know she isn't waiting for me. I dunno what the deal is.

Coming from a guy... I love kissing. And kissing while haveing sex is a huge turn on

dont get me wrong.. im a big fan of kissing, and its a great companion to sex, i just dont have the urge to sit and 'make out' on the sofa all the time. my girl doesn't [or shouldn't] need me to spend all the time kissing her to make sure she knows i love her.

Not sure if he may have an issue. I don't and I am not the kissing type. I don't really care if it is during intimacy, but I am not fond of displaying affection in public. Maybe that is why my girl did not feel loved. lol!

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Originally Posted by survivor08 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I don't really care if it is during intimacy, but I am not fond of displaying affection in public

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I've done a few years in the British Army [probably why im so screwed up] but its ingrained into me PDA's or public displays of affection get you laps of the drill square in full pack. I obviously realise i am no longer going to get laps [haha] but PDA's just aint my thing!

What do you guys consider PDA? Little kisses? Holding hands? Hugging?

My ex and I usually always held hands while we were walking and I'd hold her when we were stopped somewhere sometimes. We'd kiss, but they'd be little short kisses. We didn't do the tongue kissing in public.

I don't think PDA is bad as long as people aren't sucking face.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VX58TfMj5UI"]YouTube - Cher - shoop shoop song (it´s in his kiss)[/ame]

if you wanna know if he loves you so it's in his kiss.

WEIRD, REALLY WEIRD! I can't imagine being romantically or sexually involved with someone without kissing. Sex with him must be awful. If he kisses you everywhere else but on the mouth I'd say you tasted funny. But if he doesn't kiss anywhere I'd say he's just plain weird or else has a kissing fobia

Just Googled it, it exists .......and called.....


Philemaphobia or Philematophobia- Fear of kissing.

However he could also suffer from the following:


Spermatophobia or Spermophobia- Fear of germs.
Odontophobia- Fear of teeth or dental surgery.
Parthenophobia- Fear of virgins or young girls.
Sexophobia- Fear of the opposite sex. (Heterophobia)


Some of my own personal favourites..lol

Kolpophobia- Fear of genitals, particularly female.

Medorthophobia- Fear of an erect penis

Phallophobia- Fear of a penis, esp erect.


Novercaphobia- Fear of your step-mother. LOL



Have a look here: [url]http://phobialist.com/#S-[/url] Just tooooooooooooo funny

Maybe that is why I am where I am, single again. I remember that one time early in my relationship, my girl asked me to stop the car and literary gropped me and since I got caught off guard and did not show the same enthusiasm....she litereally cried...now there is an emotional girl, don't know what the heck went thru her mind at that point, but I can rest assured I paid for not welcoming her advances...for a couple of days...I did not mean anything by it...just never has been my thing...

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Originally Posted by survivor08 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Maybe that is why I am where I am, single again. I remember that one time early in my relationship, my girl asked me to stop the car and literary gropped me and since I got caught off guard and did not show the same enthusiasm....she litereally cried...now there is an emotional girl, don't know what the heck went thru her mind at that point, but I can rest assured I paid for not welcoming her advances...for a couple of days...I did not mean anything by it...just never has been my thing...

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That's going a little overboard I think.

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Originally Posted by psydex [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

dont get me wrong.. im a big fan of kissing, and its a great companion to sex, i just dont have the urge to sit and 'make out' on the sofa all the time. my girl doesn't [or shouldn't] need me to spend all the time kissing her to make sure she knows i love her.

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I'm on the same page as you...my ex would always ask me why I didn't kiss her all the time.

Well...I just don't feel like being attached to your face all the time when we're alone. Sometimes I just want to sit there and relax with you. I agree, just because I'm not kissing you doesn't mean I don't love you. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE kissing. It's one of those things that just always feels right. I'm always willing to take a kiss, but not do it always and continuously making out. I'm also not too big on PDA either. As long as it's not in excess.

I think I'm just an old fart in a young body...people tell me I act too mature for my age.

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Originally Posted by Cain [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That's going a little overboard I think.

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Yeah, some women do that when they don't get what they want. Not cool.:sad2:

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Originally Posted by 1averagejoe [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I'm on the same page as you...my ex would always ask me why I didn't kiss her all the time.

Well...I just don't feel like being attached to your face all the time when we're alone. Sometimes I just want to sit there and relax with you. I agree, just because I'm not kissing you doesn't mean I don't love you. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE kissing. It's one of those things that just always feels right. I'm always willing to take a kiss, but not do it always and continuously making out. I'm also not too big on PDA either. As long as it's not in excess.

I think I'm just an old fart in a young body...people tell me I act too mature for my age.

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Am I a rare girl who doesn't care for too much kissing? I don't like PDA either.

Now I realize it's a little cute...oh well. :sad2:

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Originally Posted by 1averagejoe [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I'm on the same page as you...my ex would always ask me why I didn't kiss her all the time.

Well...I just don't feel like being attached to your face all the time when we're alone. Sometimes I just want to sit there and relax with you. I agree, just because I'm not kissing you doesn't mean I don't love you. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE kissing. It's one of those things that just always feels right. I'm always willing to take a kiss, but not do it always and continuously making out. I'm also not too big on PDA either. As long as it's not in excess.

I think I'm just an old fart in a young body...people tell me I act too mature for my age.

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thats it mate... im only 22 [23 in a month..] but im not one for eating peoples faces in public.. i can usually get a chip buttie if i feel hungry enough to eat someones tonsils in public.

i would giv my lass a kiss at what i'd see as appropriate times.. when i get up, before i go to work, when i get home, and when we go to bed... and obviously wehn were getting a bit more intimate... any more and its just odd i feel...




having said that however, a new ralationship is bound to have its over indulgence in the kissing department...




on a separate note... still kinda relating to the 1st thread... how long have you been seeing this guy?

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Originally Posted by jen's mind [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I'm trying to understand why my boyfriend won't kiss me, and trying to not go crazy with frustration over it. He and I have been together for a couple of months and are still getting to know each other. Our sexual chemistry is off the charts, and the few times we have kissed at length have been amazing. He's an incredible kisser (though I'm of the opinion that you can only be as good a kisser as the person you're kissing!) and I could kiss him all day/night long. He doesn't kiss during sex, and really not at any time.

We both have meticulous hygiene and use mouthwash consistently, so it's not about bad breath or anything. I asked him directly last night, "Why don't you like to kiss me?" and he said "I just don't think about it. It doesn't occur to me." Then I asked him if kissing turns him on, and he said, "Sure, a little bit, I guess."

Guys, can you share some insight here? Am I going to have to get used to life without kissing? I'm not sure I can stand it. I love to kiss, and I especially love to kiss HIM. Is there anything I can do that might get him to kiss me more?

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I presume you dont have bad teeth. So I'm not really sure what his reasons are.

Does he come from some religious background? Maybe a guilt complex???

Maybe he has a germ phobia or some sort of anxiety disorder?

Do you ever see him kissing any former girlfriends or are you his girlfriend?

Well my guess would be He doesn't like u very much, means, he's in it for the sex.
But u said he already met ure parents. I would never meet some girl's parents if im with her for the sex only.
So u guess he loves u but doesn't love kissing u so much or maybe he just feels that he doesn't need to kiss u that often, but not kissing u during sex.... that part I can't explain, its just too strange.
When i have sex I would kiss and lick the girl everywhere I can xD
and i think its normal to do that and it takes a huge part when having sex.
And about the PDA, i love kissing my girl every now and than.
For what Psydex said:
i guess u like more to have a mechanic relationship, having scheduled ure kisses like that... pff one for good morning, 1 before work, one after work ffs I think those kisses loose their meaning.
It looks like ure doing them just cuz u think that's the right thing to do and the emotions r gone.
As for the making out.....I don't make out unless I want to have sex.
I've been with many girls in my life but had very few relationships
not cuz im not good at it but cuz i want to have a real bond with the girl im with giving her kisses when ever i think of and she would kiss me back. That's what relationships r for being able to satisfy ure emotional/physical needs when ever u feel and she can do the same too. Don't get me wrong its not a selfish act that's what its called mutual trust and love. That's what "I'll always be there for u" means
If u kiss ure girl only before bed (and go to sleep after) or when u go to/come back from work means u don't have and needs to satisfy or u already did with some1 else ~_^

Srry for the mistakes in the text English is not my native language.

Pozz
igi

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Does he come from some religious background? Maybe a guilt complex???

Maybe he has a germ phobia or some sort of anxiety disorder?

Do you ever see him kissing any former girlfriends or are you his girlfriend?

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No religious background, and loving parents together for 40 years.
No apparent complexes, phobias or freakouts to speak of.
I am his girlfriend, and I won't be standing around to watch him kiss an ex.

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on a separate note... still kinda relating to the 1st thread... how long have you been seeing this guy?

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We've only been together for two months. Still feeling each other out, to be sure, but we've been together 24/7 since we met. (We both freelance.)

Just to be clear, this isn't a PDA issue. I'm not trying to kiss him in public, just in private and especially in bed. Plus, he holds my hand when we walk down the street and has hugged me in the grocery store.

Sex is great, but it would be off the charts if kissing was part of it. Is this an intimacy issue?

I have an incendiary theory... perhaps porn is to blame?

Porn has nothing to with it, i mean i can't think of a way how would it affect kissing or not kissing.
I think we have a first here xD
How can he hug u without thinking of kissing u.
How can he have sex with with without thinking of kissing u.
It's very strange to me
How he even gets u in bed???
He says "Wanna have sex?"

Have u tried kissing him during sex and see what happens?


Pozz
igi

Some people never think to kiss....it's just not a natural characteristic about them. I am like that too. I have to 'think' about kissing, and I don't do any 'greeting' or 'goodbye' kisses. The only kisses I would do is playful or in the heat of passion, lol.

You may have to initiate it most of the time or either deal with him the way he is, let him know you have issues with it, or leave him.

My bf does the kiss over the forehead thing and I think it's very cute and great although I feel like a child at times but I still like it. :D

A little off topic: the mouth can be one of the nastiest body parts to touch....I don't like to think about that too much. :tough:

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Originally Posted by jen's mind [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Is this an intimacy issue?

I have an incendiary theory... perhaps porn is to blame?

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It could be an intimacy issue, but more info is needed.

Porn may be a culprit. Some people may mock the things in pornography.

However, I never watch porn and feel similar but I do like kissing. I love kissing. I just don't do it if I am not feeling a desire for it.

There may be some imtimacy issues possibly or you may just have to initiate it most times.

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Originally Posted by jen's mind [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I am his girlfriend, and I won't be standing around to watch him kiss an ex.

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I mean do you know if he had an girlfriend befor (sorry I dont know his age)???

u all are overthinking all of this. i have a really simple answer that could be it. maybe he's afraid u think he's a bad kisser? i know i was scared the first few times i cut the make out session short because i thought i was a bad kisser until my gf said i was actually really good.