i get easily jealous and insecure for some reason and it hella bugs me when my gf tells me about how this one guy near her work always flirts w/ her. Do girls do this normally while in a relationship? Am I justified in feeling kinda irritated or is this something girls normally do anyway?
I've found that whenever I tell my boy that some guy was hitting on me, he responds with an "OH." and changes the subject quickly. I don't generally do it, unless I'm just not realizing who I'm talking to. Get really sarcastic about it, or start telling her about some chick that hit on you, and she'll stop doing it.
Then again, if we're out and a cashier or waiter is hitting on me, he feels proud that, and I quote, "such a dorky guy like him can get such an attractive girl".
get used to it... lol.. no matter what the case it.. girls do it alot... lol... some do it caz they're naturally insecure.. which there's nothing wrong with that... they just wanna test and see if you care about them.. so.. it may not even be true.. but they just wanna feel that u care pretty much...Quote:
Originally Posted by singularity2006
then.. there are those that lie about it caz they just like to make u jealous or think it's funny teasing u...
then... u have the ones that are really not lying about it at all... like my 2nd ex gf for example... she had guys comming to her all the time... some she would tell me about.. but if she would tell me about all the guys that would come up to her during the day.. we'd never have time to talk about anything else... in the beginning, u feel like crap... :( but then.. u kinda realize that she's had enough of the attention to begin with.. and she's sick of it by now... so it doesn't bother u at all...
in any case... it really depends... i wouldn't be bugged out about it at all...
if it's true.. good for both of you.. after all.. you're going out with her.. doesn't it feel nice knowing that ur not the only guy who knows she's special???
if's she's lying.. just make shur she's not doing it for the purpose of making u jealous.. caz then.. that's just messed up...
hmmp..no othe rguy hits on me so..i HAVE nothing to tell my bf... :( BUT if there was sumone who was constantly hitting on me i'd probably tell him..and we'd laugh about it...i mean it's sumone else hitting on your girl...it's not liek SHE'S the one flirting...Quote:
Originally Posted by singularity2006
Very good point, I agree 100%. If a girl is in a relationship, and another guy hits on her, it generally makes her feel flattered, yet is a reminder of the great guy she's with who never had to use cheesy lines XDQuote:
Originally Posted by XPixiedustX
actually.. cheasy lines work really well... if u use them in a sarcastic tone... like... if u say them.. not in the hope of them working.. but just to sound silly.. and have a good laugh.. and as long as u say it in a way that both of u know that's y it was said... then it's all in good fun.. and it's a great way to break the ice...Quote:
Originally Posted by justonekiss
i hope nobody is says cheasy lines with a serious face.. :goofy:
hrm... i guess. it's really really weird what I have. Personally, I hold lots of my folks' old school values. They take relationships VERY seriously and dare not speak of anything about members of the opposite sex no matter what the issue. But I guess at the same time I want to become more westernized as well. I found that while I was single, I hella hit on girls and hella went out alot. But now that I'm in a relationship, I've totally turned around on that and shun it. I mean, I even find it weird that my sister in law spends so much time talking w/ her guy friends from yesteryear and my brother seems totally fine about it.... it's hard balancing and accepting various parts of my dual culture especially since I can see two people who have guy and girl friends the same and both sides are totally okay with it but in my more old school culture, you abandon all your friends when you get married and only keep friends of the same sex.
I usually tell my bf when other guys hit on me, but not all the time. Sometimes I plain just don't remember or don't figure it's important.
But if it's like, my ex-boss (the rich aussie millionaire I mentioned in a thread loooong ago) who asked me out for coffee just today, then HELL no. He'd hunt him down and murder him. I don't need that on my conscience.
ehr.... i guess that makes a diff. but i dunno, it seems innocent enough, though i find it kind of irritating how she makes small mention of it every few days after work. She works at a bakery and this dude that works at the water place next door keeps eyeing her and she keeps telling me about it.
i expect my Gf to tell the guy off if someone is flirting with her ... or slap him if he gets too close . unfortunately , she usually *forgot* that guys were hitting on her and dindt tell me usually or did shit about it and thats why i lost trust in her and we broke up and now i cant stand her even tho i once thought i was gonna marry her ...
just goes to show you that girls shouldnt enjoy being hit on when their already taken ...imagine that but on YOUR bf ... now how would you feel if your BF/ GF would ENJOY being hit on even tho he/she is taken and not tell you that he/she enjoys it and would not tell you if it happened ?
that's wild late_vamp. I kind of feel that way too. But I do admit, when I was single, I hella liked the attention.... now, i kind of feel much more reserved.
Hi singularity2006
I can kind of understand where you and Late_vamp are coming from. My ex used to tell me about people hitting on her every single time and she enjoyed that and thought there is nothing wrong with that. She would even go a step further and try to befriend the guys who hit on her and then would misunderstand why i didn't like that about her with words like "Oh, but i'm your gf, theres nothing wrong with that, we're just friends, you SHOULD be able to trust me, why you DON'T TRUST me??? rar rar rar rar rar rar". Yes, that's very ugly when it gets to that stage. A sole reason why we broke up by the way.
I think there is nothing wrong when your gf tells you about guys who hit on her, but i think it should be followed by a negative reaction that she gave to the person who hit on her and not a positive reaction like "Oh, but he told me about all his feelings and how beautiful i look and i cant just turn him down after all that, that would be so mean to him, i'd just have to go out with him as a friend and spend some time to get to know him". A Big Big no no in my book :stuckup:
Respect...
You just have to accept it.. if you have an attractive girlfriend - she's going to get hit on, it's just GOING to happen. I think what's important, is her reaction, like already said. Whenever any of my g/f's told me about gettin hit on I'd always just go along with it and just be laugh and say "What'd you tell him?"
I mean, of course it bothered me, no one WANTS other guys hittin on their girl, but it's also a compliment and reminder how beautiful she is. It's just natural, now if she's flirtin back that's when we have a problem.. a little flirting is okay, and expected.. but as long as it stays as just that - just a little flirting.
I had an ex girlfriend that was THE nicest person in the world - she was SO cheesy and I use to tease her for it.. she was always so polite and so nice to people she didn't know well, she'd do things for people she didn't want to just because she didn't want to say no - then when we're alone she'd complain about it and stuff.. LoL so many times I'd have to help her out of situations.. anyways - when guys would ask her for her number she'd give it to them JUST so she could get away and not have to deal with them sayin "oh c'mon girl blah blah blah" and that use to make me sooo mad... she'd always be like "What's the big deal, I don't answer when they do call I just give it them to get rid of them" and I'm like, "How does that make me look when we're out and they see you with me and know you gave them your number? Makes me look like a chump". She learned finally to stop and tell guys "Sorry I have a boyfriend" well at least until she met the guy she left me for ^_^
LoL sorry for rambling ;p
I tell, I like to be honest about it
"Do girls do this normally while in a relationship?"
Yes, in my experience, my gfs have told me about being hit on. Not every single time (thank God), but in general they do.
"Am I justified in feeling kinda irritated or is this something girls normally do anyway?"
I dont understand your question. Your feelings are your feelings. You dont have to justify feeling irritated if that is how you feel.
Did she tell you casually? Did she tell you in a idle way, as if to purposely get you worked up?
I casually mentioned it once when I was dating this one guy......but honestly I kinda keep it to myself. I mean whats the big deal if Im not looking??
It is flattering though......and usually happens when I'm in a relationship. Im always thinking "Damn...where was he when I was single?"
Then when Im single I sometimes feel ignored like the plague....sighs. :(
I personally hate it when my girlfriend tells me those things, just like when she asks me about my past history with women. Nothing good can come from those questions, only things like jealousy. Just no point to mention it in my opinion.
yeah, totally casual. i got back at her though because she noticed this chick at this restaurant hella checks me out when she goes grocery shopping at my place... hell, i didn't even notice. so i use that against her, sorta.. lol.Quote:
Originally Posted by carpflounder
damn i totally know how u feel.... :sad2:Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellynn
Yes I do as a matter of fact and my bf gets a kick out of it! He loves it that I get attention from other males. He is not the jealous type.
it bugs me too when my ex does the same(we are getting back together soon) and she did it when we were going out..would you rather she cheated on you though?Quote:
Originally Posted by singularity2006
my ex didnt like the guy who was flirting with her and im the only guy she likes...so i guess im good..i still get jealous tho
btw ask her if she likes the guy..just to make sure there isnt any lingo going on there
funny location lilwing....gave me a good laugh
my bf talks about sex that he had with his ex gf's how's that for kickers? uhhh i'm a dumbass for listening to it.
I have told my boyfriend of one story in particular. Just cuz I thought it was funny and even inappropriate as it was a business acquaintance. I'm not sure if it ticked him off that I told him.
Otherwise, I don't really bother telling him. If it is just the normal run of the mill "come on" then there isn't really any point in it. But the odd time it might be particularly funny or interesting or something.
shit , today i just told my GF that a girl in the metro keept checking me out ... staring the whole time ... dumb story byt wtv..( SKIP unless your bored)
i was in a rush so i was eating burger king in a metro station ... waiting for it to come ... mind you , this is RIGGHHT after work ... so everybody is starving ... lucky for me i finished earlier :D ... so there i am , enjoying my fries like a fat kid who got cake ... and i look up ... i see a BUNCH of ppl just staring at my food from all over the places ... its kinda rare too see anybody eating in a metro station here ... so i was making noise with the paper bag and ppl were looking in the corner of their eyes by now ... so i got in the metro , stuffed the bag as fast as i could IN my coat ( that i was wearing) and chugged that 7UP as fast as i could before i went in ... thank god i finished my fries before .
so im sitting and a girl ... that was next to me before , gives me a curisity look ... then i see her look changes and she keeps doing slight hints like flipping her hair while staring , having her legs crossed and sort of kicking the air till i looked and then she smiled ... so im there thinking " she must have thought i was some sort of freak for eating burger king in a dirty metro ... the she saw what i looked like and changed her point of view of me"...
too bad she keept going on the metro and i had to swith lanes and that i was "taken" ... if not i would of approached her ...
HEYY , good news ... she apologized ... said she dint like that because she loves me and she got jealous (about something else) ... i dont know at what tho ... wtv ... things are good for now.
ps .. i got my recent GF by approaching her in the metro ...
Damnit, that made me want Burger King!
i forgot to mention when everybody was laughing
i then proceeded to get in my car after riding the metro ... i got in , started driving , during a stop i pull out the burger , peel the paper off just enough so i can bite it . then i start driving with my elbow and im eating at the same time ... all this with some loud music playing and me trying to sing with a mouth full and nod my head . then i look next to me during a stop ... both cars next to me were laughing their asses of and looking at me . i was laughing also ... they werent laughing at me , i could tell , they were laughing because it was hilarious .
this happened for most cars thats passed next to me for like 10 mins .
LoL good stuff LV, and yeah that makes me hungry for some BK!