Shy couple (need help!)

Hi,
I'm 15 and really need help. I'm a very shy person, and so is my love.
It's a girl from my school, and appareantly she fell in love with me. We have some common friends and she asked my email to a friend of mine.
On MSN we were very close and talked to eachother like we already were together for years. I actually fell in love with her personality from the first time we chatted.
She's very cute and a few weeks later she said she had feelings for me, and we just got a step closer. The day after I just couldn't hold myself and said I loved her.
We dated and had a nice chat, but we were very shy. There's that strange connection between us and we both have that same feeling when are are close to eachother.

That same evening we declared ourselves soulmates/couple, but we're so shy... we can't even stand next to eachother and talk at school, we are ashamed for our friends, and the fact they're all pushing us ("don't be so shy, go to your girlfriend!", etc..) doesn't helps much.
I think we should date some more, but it'snt really satisfactioning when we don't dare to hold eachother, kiss or hug.
But we love eachother soooo amazingly much, I never loved a person so much as I love her.

The girl I'm talkin' about isn't shy with other girls or boys, but with me she is sooo silent (is that good or bad?, she said she was afraid of saying things that might be wrong and she thought i didn't like her anymore, but I thought the same).
It was our first date (and actually my very first real date with anyone) and maybe it's normal that it's that way.
But today on the school's playground we were very, very shy again, and we didn't dare to stand next to eachother. We talked a while, but we didn't really know what to say.
The rest of the day we didn't really talk anymore (it stayed with a 'hi' or 'hello' when we crossed), but it's my girlfriend, and we clearly love eachother!
I really don't know what to do now, or what's going on. Are there any other people who had a relation like this? But tomorrow is a new day and maybe it's gonna be OK by then.

But it's still a great mystery what's wrong and how we can improve our relationship.
Please help me with being so shy, this site is my last hope :(
Please give tips, I really need them right now :sad2:

I never was a great romanticus, but this love really makes me from happy to depressed and in the other way. We're together for just a few days now.

PLZ PLZ PLZ help me :( :sad2:

I don't know what to tell you. You are a few steps ahead of were I was. I think it is normal though to be shy around the person you love. I used to get this rush like feeling and it would really prevent me from taking any action. You just have to talk to her and get comfortable around her. Take a deep breath and just talk to her as if it was on MSN or were ever you declared your love.

Thx for the tip, i'm gonna try tomorrow, but i'm sure it won't work :(

I just can't, can't, can't, no matter how hard I try :(

Thats so sweet hehe...

Why is being shy such a bad thing? I used to be sooooo shy... I didnt had a boyfriend for a long time either. This shyness is kinda what brought you to together. I dont see it as a bad thing..as long as you can make a little conversation and you have fun together thats all that matters.
It is a problem, though, if you find yourselves just sitting there looking away from each other and giggling... hehe aww young love.

Have you talked to the girl over MSN or wherever about not talking?

Certainly being sad about it won't help you. As far as I'm concerned your only problem is worrying about it. If you're talking at all it's good enough, it just means you need to get used to becoming an item. At your age, the truly loving couples do find it hard to get accustomed to their new partner straight away, just keep it consistent, and maybe try increasing the physical contact you have with each other just when your talking, even if it's only a touch of the hand.

shyness.....is beautiful to a point. :)

mate , if u like her so much, then for the sake of the feelings u have for her, make an effort to be comfortable around her. she likes u and sure she ought to do the same.

i know it is hard. but hey anything worth any value in this world doesnt come just like that. if u love her , than mate make an effort.

best of luck

Hussain

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Originally Posted by ALovelyLady86

hehe aww young love.

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Is older love any different ? :)

Well...I think it depends...
On the person and the situation
It seems like the older a person gets, the more negitive they get about relationships. They seem to think that because theyve experienced so many bad ones, thats all that exists are bad relationships.
I believe that as longs as you stay positive about it, youll be more likely to have a positive relationship in the long run. And even if you dont, at least you can say you didnt miss out because of thinking that you could never have one.
I've been through a ton of crap in my life, and some days I do wakeup on the wrong side of the bed wishing my life never was and that everything could just go away. But, for the most part, 99% of the time I am in a great mood and its because I know I cant change what is now, but I CAN change what is to be... and I will. Believe it or not, Ive never had a point in my life where I could sit back and relax and tell myself everything is okay. So many people have that, and they dont even realize it. All these kids who have cars given to them when theyre 16... I'm driving a $1300 POS but it gets me around.
I'm getting off track... I know
I guess what I mean is its all about attitude. People who seem to be more negitive in their lives, and hate themselves and everything around them, attract more negitivity. Like my mother... shes been such a worrier that shes had health problems. Whereas, people who are more positive and want something for themselves, sure they go through a lot of crap, but they dont let it get them down, and in that process they earn what theyve deserved all along... good things. Besides people who love themselves dont take crap from anyone... they know whats good for them and they have standards for themselves.
There are just a lot of people who dont have standards..

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ALovelyLady86

Well...I think it depends...
On the person and the situation
It seems like the older a person gets, the more negitive they get about relationships. They seem to think that because theyve experienced so many bad ones, thats all that exists are bad relationships.
I believe that as longs as you stay positive about it, youll be more likely to have a positive relationship in the long run. And even if you dont, at least you can say you didnt miss out because of thinking that you could never have one.
I've been through a ton of crap in my life, and some days I do wakeup on the wrong side of the bed wishing my life never was and that everything could just go away. But, for the most part, 99% of the time I am in a great mood and its because I know I cant change what is now, but I CAN change what is to be... and I will. Believe it or not, Ive never had a point in my life where I could sit back and relax and tell myself everything is okay. So many people have that, and they dont even realize it. All these kids who have cars given to them when theyre 16... I'm driving a $1300 POS but it gets me around.
I'm getting off track... I know
I guess what I mean is its all about attitude. People who seem to be more negitive in their lives, and hate themselves and everything around them, attract more negitivity. Like my mother... shes been such a worrier that shes had health problems. Whereas, people who are more positive and want something for themselves, sure they go through a lot of crap, but they dont let it get them down, and in that process they earn what theyve deserved all along... good things. Besides people who love themselves dont take crap from anyone... they know whats good for them and they have standards for themselves.
There are just a lot of people who dont have standards..

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wow.. what are we talking bout again :oriental:
well i thought for a second i am on a wrong forum!!!
but hey alls-well as long as its LF:)

I was answering someones question :)

oh.. i thought it was a class on philosophy!!

If you really love her, you will try and be more confident. Just think to yourself, listen to your favourite kind of music that gets you going while you think.

I used to be real shy too, until someone wanted to go out with me, and for some reason now I'm not shy... doesn't really make much sense lol.

Well, I'll just leave my tips, and best of luck. :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ALovelyLady86

Well...I think it depends...
On the person and the situation
It seems like the older a person gets, the more negitive they get about relationships. They seem to think that because theyve experienced so many bad ones, thats all that exists are bad relationships.
I believe that as longs as you stay positive about it, youll be more likely to have a positive relationship in the long run. And even if you dont, at least you can say you didnt miss out because of thinking that you could never have one.
I've been through a ton of crap in my life, and some days I do wakeup on the wrong side of the bed wishing my life never was and that everything could just go away. But, for the most part, 99% of the time I am in a great mood and its because I know I cant change what is now, but I CAN change what is to be... and I will. Believe it or not, Ive never had a point in my life where I could sit back and relax and tell myself everything is okay. So many people have that, and they dont even realize it. All these kids who have cars given to them when theyre 16... I'm driving a $1300 POS but it gets me around.
I'm getting off track... I know
I guess what I mean is its all about attitude. People who seem to be more negitive in their lives, and hate themselves and everything around them, attract more negitivity. Like my mother... shes been such a worrier that shes had health problems. Whereas, people who are more positive and want something for themselves, sure they go through a lot of crap, but they dont let it get them down, and in that process they earn what theyve deserved all along... good things. Besides people who love themselves dont take crap from anyone... they know whats good for them and they have standards for themselves.
There are just a lot of people who dont have standards..

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I guess that is one view. I am not sure if I agree with all this. I HATE my freaking life to no degree. I have a friend who has a wonder-full girlfriend, money, great job, calm life, love, and lots of luck...he is very happy and says so all the time. I have none of those and I am not going to walk around with all this fake positivity that is not really there because I prefer to stay true to my-self.

I think sometimes this world runs in reverse. I think the people who are having a hard time in their life and know it should get a little luck on their side...not those people who spread all this positivity and happiness...they allready have all that. More proof that god is bogus. Why would those who suffer be forced to suffer more?.

PS: I got my first car for free....big woopdydoo..a piece of metal...yeay..(Here come the people who are going to say " you don't appriecitate the little things in life ::holds up a shield:: )

But you cant just let life get you down just because everything isnt handed to you on a silver platter you know? :) Sweetie I've been there.. the no luck thing.. at this point I'm dealing with a dying mother, a dying grandmother, and a father whos had 4 heart attacks whose doctor says he might be due another one. Guess where I have to go when theyre all dead? Ya.. pretty much nowhere. I do have a half sister and I'm sure she would take me in. Even with all that going on right now, this is the most relaxed I've been in a while... this is actually the best my life has been so far.
When it comes to God handing certian people luck, and certain people pain, God will only give you as much as you can handle... He said so himself... so for someone to be given a bunch of bad luck, He must think quite a bit if you to be able to handle yourself.. you must have quite a head on your shoulders. :)
Also, these people with a lot of money and happiness and great girlfriends. Let me tell you, just because it appears that way on the outside doesnt mean its that way inside the home. People who have money that isnt inherited, had to work for that money...and they had to work very hard. They deserve the money they have because they worked so hard to earn it.
There are others who "know people" and get the nice end of the deal sure, but for the most part people really have to work their butts off to have anything they have.
My life has handed me lots of pain, LOTS of hardship, but I stay positive because I know I'll be fine in the end. When all this is over I'll be able to relax without looking behind me every step of the way, wondering who will die next or who will do what to me next... I think everything will be ok if I make it ok. If I dont bother and just say oh well.. then of course my life will stay the same. Different actions produce different results.
Keep your head up :) Youre worth everything in the world... so go out and make something of yourself.

Sorry about your situation. I would take your pain for you if I could since it would just stack on-top of mine anyways. I do understand everything you are saying though thanks AlovelyLady86.

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Originally Posted by ALovelyLady86

But you cant just let life get you down just because everything isnt handed to you on a silver platter you know? :) .

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Yea, I hear this all the time. Sometimes it seems hard to find a way to put stuff your-self on that platter though.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ALovelyLady86

When it comes to God handing certian people luck, and certain people pain, God will only give you as much as you can handle...

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Can you tell him to send some luck my way then.? I am sure I can handle happiness just as well as pain if not better. I think there was a mix up and I have been getting all the pain...paper work was messed up in heaven office or something hehe.

Those people who have had it easy all their life will almost always come to a situation where they will fail miserably because they have no idea how to cope with anything other than being spoilt.

Anyhow, I thought seeing your glass half full is better than seeing it half empty, I know that it's worked for me, I'm so much happier.

I agree... life is always going to be hard at one point or another for EVERYONE... so you might as well show everyone you can handle it head on...

Yea, we all fail at some point. Its not just the way you earn your things and if you are independent..some people just have better opportunities in general you know what I mean?

Of course they do.. Some kids are born into rich homes and have $30,000 cars at 16, but if they arent smart enough to be able to earn their own living, theyll just have to live at home for the rest of their lives and be idiots. People like that arent worldly smart...
I would rather be worldly smart than rich and have everything handed to me anyway.

I dont think they are idiots but maybe not as good at finding a job. Hey, i say if you dont need to get a job to get the things you need then more power to you but I dont have what I want. Were else would you live but at home? They might even have a home handed to them...man that would be the life :sad2: .

Oh quit thinking so negitively... who knows maybe youll meet a great girl that will help you get on your feet... maybe youll meet someone one day that will ultimately give you happiness, and then youll want to do things.

Yea.....maybe....

Hey you know..it is possible... :)

Ya I definately know the depression thing. I was severly depressed for 4 years... 3 of which I was with my dreaded mother... 1 with my father, not because of him or my new life with him, just... couldnt get out of it I guess.
It's hard, but one day you pretty much wake up saying "screw this depression crap"... and you go out and at least try to make something of yourself. Course I had downfalls, but I never really totally fell back into it even though my doctor swear I am depressed now...
Maybe I am... I have a total lack in energy, I do still have a lot of negitive thoughts, I guess the part about me that isnt depressed is the fact that I dont show other people.
Who knows, but I am determined.
My father is a recovering alcoholic, has been clean for 5 years and 4 months now :) Aegis you can do it I have no doubt. I remember being 14 and seeing my father comatose on his bed... it was so scary, and he should be dead now having had 4 heart attacks already, but hes not and I know why now. He is definately here to be here for me. All those things OV make me believe there has to be a God.

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Originally Posted by ALovelyLady86

Hey you know..it is possible... :)

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So is winning the lottery.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Aegis

Lol, if I knew you personally, I'd probably propose. :)

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