Staring

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22-06-13, 08:18 AM
a_mart

Staring

Hi!

I usually go to a village to spend the weekends and holidays. There's a guy there, I went to school with him but we have never talked (apart from saying bye).
The thing is that whenever he finds me he stares at my face for a long time and if I look at him he keeps on looking at me with no expression at all. He doesn't look away and that's a bit uncomfortable to me because I'm very shy.

A couple of weeks ago we were in a ward, my sister was with me and I had to get up several times to help giving out some papers. My sister and I never talk about this kind of things, but when we went out she told me that every time I was walking he followed my with his eyes, looking at my bottom. I was kind of shocked because I had never seen him looking at my body, just my face.

So the question is: Why do you think that he looks at me like that? And why doesn' he look away?
22-06-13, 08:41 AM
michelle23

Id find that real creepy. He doesnt even smile? Stay away from him. Thats the type you dont wana find yourself alone with.

If he just has an expressionless stare, dead eyes.. Hes bad news
22-06-13, 09:40 AM
basilandthyme

Yep - creepy
22-06-13, 10:13 AM
AbigailR

That would give me the heebie jeebies. He could at least smile when you catch him looking, or look away, wave, say hi.. something other than what he's doing.
22-06-13, 02:28 PM
a_mart

well, I don't know very well if he's always expresionless because he's not usualy very near when he does that and, as I said I'm shy, so maybe I don't look at him enough time to really know if he changes his face.
When I find him closer then he doen't behave like that, he just smiles and says goodbye.
22-06-13, 02:30 PM
a_mart

sorry, message duplicated
22-06-13, 06:11 PM
michelle23

Does he creep you out? If not, why dont you just smile and say hi to him next time you catch him looking?
24-06-13, 02:14 AM
a_mart

Quote:

Originally Posted by michelle23 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Does he creep you out? If not, why dont you just smile and say hi to him next time you catch him looking?

I don't really like him, but I'd like to know what he thinks when he looks at me like that and why does he do that. Is it because he likes me or maybe just the opposite?
Mi sister says that he thinks I'm out of his league but he looks at me like saying: hey, I'm here, avaliable, just in case someday you notice me.
But you all seem to think that he could be dangerous. And I don't know what to think anymore.

Could my sister be right?
Thank you all for your answers.
24-06-13, 04:38 AM
Truthiness

Quick perspective: I'm the youngest of 9 children from parents who were together until my mother died, and very happy most of the time. My father doesn't talk if he can help it and has always been that way.

My mother played piano in the church she grew up going to. She noticed my father staring at her, but he never talked to her. She asked her mother about it, her mother told her she should take the initiative and be friendly, that staring showed he was interested but didn't know what to do. It worked out well for them (and me, obviously). Of course every situation is different and I'm not saying you're going to marry this guy and have 9 kids. He may be totally wrong for you, but my money would be on him liking you but not knowing what to do.
24-06-13, 04:58 AM
smackie9

I can answer what he is doing. He is taking in mental images of you to use later when he masturbates. All men do this, most not as obvious as him but all the same.

[Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
24-06-13, 05:16 AM
a_mart

Truthiness, I really like your answer and your story, and I'd really love that to be the reason of his behaviour.

And about the mental images... wow, I hope men don't actually do that. It's so disgusting thinking that he could be doing that right now with my image in his head... oh, please some man tell me that's not so common.
24-06-13, 05:20 AM
smackie9

Quote:

Originally Posted by a_mart [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

oh, please some man tell me that's not so common.

Good luck with that.
24-06-13, 05:27 AM
smackie9

Here is a classic example in the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High.
[Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

LR you need to see this!
24-06-13, 05:51 AM
a_mart

OK. Now I don't think I can say bye to him again.
Next week I'm going there to stay until september and I'm going to have to see him a lot. There are only 150 inhabitants in the village, so he's going to have a lot of good times if you're right. I think I'll try to avoid him as much as possible.
24-06-13, 07:47 AM
toknow

Quote:

Originally Posted by a_mart [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Hi!

I usually go to a village to spend the weekends and holidays. There's a guy there, I went to school with him but we have never talked (apart from saying bye).
The thing is that whenever he finds me he stares at my face for a long time and if I look at him he keeps on looking at me with no expression at all. He doesn't look away and that's a bit uncomfortable to me because I'm very shy.

A couple of weeks ago we were in a ward, my sister was with me and I had to get up several times to help giving out some papers. My sister and I never talk about this kind of things, but when we went out she told me that every time I was walking he followed my with his eyes, looking at my bottom. I was kind of shocked because I had never seen him looking at my body, just my face.

So the question is: Why do you think that he looks at me like that? And why doesn' he look away?

It could be he likes you a lot. But, if he does the same with other girls, then you should not be very flattered.
24-06-13, 07:48 AM
a_mart

Quote:

Originally Posted by toknow [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

It could be he likes you a lot. But, if he does the same with other girls, then you should not be very flattered.

He doesn't as far as I'm concerned.
24-06-13, 07:51 AM
toknow

Girls need to understand all the attention you are getting means nothing if there is no emotional connection to it. Most guys will say the same thing to a thousand girls, and that's not an exoneration. Do not fall for empty affection. Trust deep emotional bonds because those are real and lasting.
24-06-13, 07:58 AM
a_mart

That's true but sometimes emotions are difficult to communicate and to understand, especially at the beginning of a relationship. I guess if he really feels something for me he'll let me know in a clear way, so I'll wait some time.
24-06-13, 08:00 AM
Lord Darkshire

There is no need to over analyze this. He is just a poor shy guy crushing on you. If you have no interest, how he feels shouldn't be a concern of yours, just ignore him. If you have to talk to him, just be polite and then carry on with whatever you are doing. There, simple.
24-06-13, 08:07 AM
a_mart

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lord Darkshire [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

There is no need to over analyze this. He is just a poor shy guy crushing on you. If you have no interest, how he feels shouldn't be a concern of yours, just ignore him. If you have to talk to him, just be polite and then carry on with whatever you are doing. There, simple.

I'm not interested but I've fallen in love several times and men haven't treated me right. I want to treat him right but at the same time not giving him any hope.
In the other hand, he's not ugly or anything and I don't know him very well, maybe if I knew him better I would change my mind... or maybe not.
24-06-13, 08:18 AM
toknow

Quote:

Originally Posted by a_mart [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That's true but sometimes emotions are difficult to communicate and to understand, especially at the beginning of a relationship. I guess if he really feels something for me he'll let me know in a clear way, so I'll wait some time.

Yes, that's where actions speak louder than words and it should show in his actions. For example if he is truly in love with you he will tell you things and do things for you that he hasn't done for anyone else. You will stand out in his heart and mind and it will be obvious. He wouldn't care to flirt or even look at other women, let alone do more. I know many here think if you are "in love" you'd still be checking out other people, and I completely disagree with this - true love doesn't lack in anything...you simply won't have the urge to look around, because if you do it means you're missing something and are still looking.