4 year rut :(

Well yesterday marked 4 years since i've been on a date or had anything close to a relationship and yeah it sucks. I'm 28 and i've never actually been in a real relationship (last date the girl only liked me a friend anyway and nothing else), been trying OLD for almost two years now which seems to be a strange lottery or game. I have a small social circle and can be rather socially awkward, nobody available at work or among my friends, it just seems i look around me and everyone seems to have someone and i think, is there something wrong with me? what i am doing wrong?
Sorry to rant, just a rather gloomy anniversary that has left be a bit low :(

get on plenty of fish, get out there man and get some vagina. Im just like you, but just try otherwise it wont happen

Happy Anniversary!

um, yeah thanks hope that is sarcasm

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Originally Posted by FAndrews [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

um, yeah thanks hope that is sarcasm

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Yes... it's a bit of humour that hopefully you, yourself got a chuckle out of.

How about you give us a run-down of what you've actually done to help yourself meet single women that would be as interested in meeting new people as you would be?

and yes the humour was appreciated :) mainly just online dating and recently a few singles nights. i have a small social circle and can be a bit socially awkward so i usually avoid the pub\clubbing scene.

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Originally Posted by FAndrews [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

and yes the humour was appreciated :) mainly just online dating and recently a few singles nights. i have a small social circle and can be a bit socially awkward so i usually avoid the pub\clubbing scene.

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Unless you work on yourself and find a solution to your social awkwardness nothing will change. Work on YOU and the rest will follow.

How about people who are in your social circle - do they have more expierience or sucsess than you? You could ask for advice on girls someone who are where you wana to be. Also where in England do you live? Can you get to London? You know you could actually save up few hundreats and get profesional help on your awkardness. Im talking about dating coaches. You could do well with a good wingman who would push you and give some advice. But it still depends on you - you have to want it.

Yes i do want it, I'm just trying to find ways to make that happen, its been simply too long for me and something has to change I've just got to work out the best way of doing that. i think my social awkwardness is a combination of my learning condition (Dyspraxia) and self-esteem issues so i know what the cause is, not sure about the idea of a dating coach, though i might be in the process of getting a wingman though (Sunday club friend I've talked into going into singles nights with me, but we have yet to go to one) but yeah its all positive suggestions, so thanks.

Good man,hope it works out for you in a club.

I mentioned London cause there are special companies who works with guys like you. For example SashaPua.com and Kezia Noble. You can watch youtube videos and decide who you like better.

I've just got to try new things and options, coaching is one option i guess, maybe in the future when i can afford it. these suggestions are all very helpful and any more comments or ideas would be great :)

you should make friends with girls.

Once you succeed, the failures will not matter.

AnErin: that is very true and partly what keeps me going :)

goodmorning: As one of only two male staff where i work (care worker in an elderly care home) i have plenty of female work friends, sadly none are single or my own age (i think I'm the only single person at work) though i am intending to hopefully change my job as that is causing all manner of other problems. not many outside of work though, need to work on that.

Probably better to get in a relationship with soemone out of the office. Things go bad then you are stuck seeing them every day. There are a ton of single woman out there wanting guys. Man just got to single nite and you will be the center of attention. Don't be so picky at first. Just go to a bar watch the ladies sitting there not talking and go say hi and offer to by them a drink.

Most of the love relationships are emotionally draining and require a daily effort once that the honey moon phase is over. There is nothing to envy about the married/attached people you know. They've got plenty of issues they're dealing with on a daily basis, some of them are even facing serious crises or simply learnt to reach a happy compromise. There are very few lucky people who haven't had to sacrifice something very important to them for a love realationship, and even less people who honestly think it was worth it.

You don't lack anything, Andrew, just the realisation that your life as a single guy is better than the life of many of those couples that make you feel insecure because their daily reality you actually don't know.

Orangesun: yeah i wouldn't try it with someone from work simply because of the issues it would cause, but yeah i do need to try more singles night.

Valixy: Well the problem is i don't really know how the other half live so to speak and have yet to properly experience a real relationship. i am ready to sacrifice certain freedoms of my single life for a real relationship? yes, i certainly am ready for that chance for happiness! especially for the right person :) bring it on!!

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Originally Posted by goodmorning [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

you should make friends with girls.

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Horseshit. "Friends" rarely ends they way you want between genders.

yeah i would have to agree with that, i've learned to never try it on with a friend or with a co-worker, causes too many problems.

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Originally Posted by HeartIsAching [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Horseshit. "Friends" rarely ends they way you want between genders.

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No you ****ing douche i meant make friends that are girls so he can get introduced to more girls. The stupidity in this forum is overwhelming.

hmm yeah no need for that, his answer could be taken both ways and yes Goodmorning you are probably right as from past experiences i wouldn't try it with a friend anyway.

Any further advice or suggestions anyone? :) thanks for the help so far.

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Originally Posted by goodmorning [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

No you ****ing douche i meant make friends that are girls so he can get introduced to more girls. The stupidity in this forum is overwhelming.

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It certainly is.

Why the name calling? If that's what you meant, you should've said that.

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Originally Posted by FAndrews [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

mainly just online dating

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Keep trying. I can guarantee you there are many socially awkward women on dating sites, so don't be afraid to say it in your profile, that you are socially awkward; women, whether they are shy/socially awkward or not, will find it cute, funny and honest of you, and will know on the first date not to expect a social butterfly.

Best of luck in your search

really? i thought my social awkwardness would put women off, judging by my past experiences. really having trouble with my OLD at the moment, don't seem to be getting much interest :(