Need opinions on whether I'm a bitch or not
I know the topic title is blunt, but yeah, its valid in this situation. A bit of backstory: Together with my husband for 8 years, married for 6. Normally a happy marriage, we're super close and best friends but this issue today is literally feuding a war and neither of us believes we're in the wrong.
Scenario: We're out to eat at Taco Bell. Yesterday I had noticed that a few of his whiskers on his beard were grey and at the time he was like "yeah I noticed it too" ...and it wasn't a big deal. Didn't mention it again until today. So we're eating our tacos and he asks me: "will you still find me attractive when I go grey?" ...I thought about it for a moment and said "well it depends... (here he freaked out and interrupted with a "IT DEPENDS?!!!") and I went on to finish "if its just your beard thats grey and your hair is still brunette, that would look silly, but if you were entirely grey, both hair and beard, absolutely I'd find you attractive" (LITERALLY MY EXACT WORDS) ...and he still freaked out. He was all "how can you be so mean?" and "you are such an asshole!" ...I tried explaining that I wouldn't find him unattractive if he went grey, but if it was just one or the other (beard or hair) then it'd look odd.
Now, I'm a blunt woman. If he asks me a question I want to answer it honestly, whether he's asking me something huge or something trivial. I don't like to sugarcoat or offer him any falsities to lead him on. If I asked him if I looked fat, I'd want an honest answer and not some "yes dear" type of answer so I make an effort not to do him the same disservice. But he takes offense to everything I answer when he asks me these types of questions. I'm not rude about anything but he still gets offended. (For the record, I find my husband very attractive and while he seems to be his worst enemy when it comes to his body image, I find him absolutely delightful and I tell him so when he asks me) ....when he asked me about the greying thing today I honestly thought I had made it clear that I would find him attractive but the mis-matched color would be strange, just like most people find a mullet strange lol. But since that conversation he's been angry, has called me a bitch, has said he can't have children with me anymore because I'd be a bad influence on them for my blunt-ness, etc. I feel he's taking this whole thing way out of proportion and making it bigger than it needs to be, and he feels I have some major character flaw for being so honest about things he'd prefer for me to lie about.
I don't think either of us are right or wrong, I think we just have mismatched personalities, but he can't seem to be able to accept that I am an honest person when it comes to personal opinions, and I am getting exhausted with how sensitive he can get over what I feel are trivial things.
Advice? Opinions?
