Not sure if this is the right forum for this but here we go.
I posted on another forum about this same girl trying to figure out if she was interested, I only just found out the reason for her distance. And its a freakin doozy!!
So I'm an open minded and understanding guy, well I try anyway.
Just started seeing this girl and we are not that serious so if I was to force myself to walk away I could.
She seemed to pull away at first and I assumed she must not be interested, as it turns out after I told her I'm not going to be strung along so farewell she told me the reason for distance. She was in a relationship for a year and a half and after breaking up she was quite hurt and vulnerable, for the next year she proceeded to become as she put it, attached and clingy to men she had met and in the course of only one year slept with 15, yes 15, men. She does not want to get close to anyone for fear of becoming too clingy and having sex or starting a relationship too quickly and in turn pushing someone else away.
Now I'm quite a jealous man, but I do a good job of not making my demons anyone else's problem, I'm not judging her at all. But to me that amount is crazy high, frankly it kind of freaks me the hell out but I'm ashamed for feeling that way, I would never make her feel bad for it. But I consider myself to be a reasonably mature guy and I refuse to be so shallow as to walk away from a lovely and very intelligent and good match because of my own demons. I cannot and will not be that guy.
This amount of men would freak out most other guys, and especially considering I myself am incredibly jealous, but as mentioned I would never let that jealousy cause her or anyone else I'm with pain.
She's obviously giving herself low self worth to give herself to that many men just to keep them around and as such has low self esteem and is in a tough place.
The intelligent thing to do is walk away, but I could see myself enjoying her company and her mine. I don't want some girl to ride of into the sunset with and make passionate love, more than anything I want a like minded soul to simply share company and good times with. I believe I'm strong minded and emotionally equipped to deal with this. Even if it stings quite a bit, I've been through much much worse.
The advice I am looking for here today is the question of can I trust a woman like this, and are there any of you out there who could move past this? Or am I simply a self destructive fool? Anyone with similar experiences? Also...15 guys in a year. That's ****ing crazy right? That's a lot of dicks, I got 15 match sticks and put them in my hand...seemed like alot of match sticks. I'm not an asshole for thinking that that's just too many? Of course I'd never burden her by saying that but damn...I love spare rib and I haven't even eaten close to fifteen spare ribs this year.
