complicated love

all right, i broke up with my girlfriend few months ago, when she was on vacation. we agreed to stay like best friends. when she came back we went out and kissed a lot but she tald me that i seemed bored, so i said her that we are not in relatonship. after that we had one more kissing, again i was saying that we were not in relationship.what an idiot. few days later one guy went out with her, but actually nothing happened. then me and my ex went out again and she tald me that she is having best time with me and that was the reason nothing happened with tht guy, also she tald me she cannoy live without me lol. i asked her to be eith me in relationship and she tald me that she cannot becouse of that guy. when i tried to kiss her she avoided it, but later she has kissed me. few days later she called me home for first time but we are teens so we were afraid to kiss becouse we thought someone would come. we are still messaging 24/7 just to let you guys know haha. one day when i arrived home from the club i asked her again to be in relationshipo with me but she said she needs a lot of thinking and she does not want to break up again. after my going to her home, my friend made a party at his home, and my ex got drunk there, and i stayed with her almost all the time of the party like an idiot. there we were kissig a lot, and even slept togheder(than she was sober but tald me a lot of nice things anyway) but when we were going homefrom party only kissed in cheek. several days later she called me out. she was talking me about guys trying to flirt with her, trying to make me jeleous i guess...anyway that was the day we had a best kissing hahahahah....but as usual, i said we were not in relationship...and when we were going home we kissed each other lips, i was going for a cheek but she wanted lips kiss...after that, 2 weeks ago before i went on vacation, we went out togheder and just kissed a few times without cuddling a lot. now i am on vacation and she often texts me telling that she is missing me...but i do not know how to feel she seems cold these days
i truly want to be with her but i do not know what to do i am confused...i know im an idiot but guys is there any advice what to do

Keep it casual, date others, don't commit you two just are not ready for relationships and commitment at this moment, your post tells me so.

Please use paragraphs

Maybe it is just me, but I've never been a big fan or supporter of this whole back and forth, kinda stuck in limbo sort of deal. You can't have it both ways. You can't say you need to be just friends one minute.... then be making out the next minute. You can't be telling each other you miss each other one minute... but then going out of your way to say you aren't in a relationship the next.

I'm a little confused by your story as to where each of you stands on it right now. Is it that you want to be in a relationship again and she doesn't? Is it that she does and you don't? Or is it that you are both confused? Because I feel like you kept saying YOU were the one to make it clear to her that you are not in a relationship.... but then yet you are telling us you kind of want her back.

Bottom line, in my personal opinion, you both need to just figure out what you actually want and then talk to each other about it. No more of this back and forth stuff... just actually sit down and talk about what you both want. If you don't want the same things, that will be a shame, but at least you will know and can move on. Even if moving on has to mean parting ways, at least then you know and can stop wasting time. Or, if you two DO want the same things, then you can start to move towards that, rather then a lot of constant doubt. Rather than moving one step forward and two steps back. Communication is key.

Good luck.