i can not live without her :/ , what should i do ??

i'm not only in love with this girl (i will call her "Emma" for the sake of the story ) for me she is the representation of the word love or any other word in the same context, i might sound crazy but anything i will write wont be able to trasmit all the feelings that i have for her.

i fell in love with her at the age of 8 at school from the first time i saw her i knew i was in love because i still have the same feeling for her and i'm now almost 30 and i have never stopped loving her anyway at school we were kind of close friends we did so much together i was at her place and she at mine and that sort of kids behavior and i always felt something for her but i was always scared of losing her forever because she was my best friend and what if she doesnt love me back and she will be gone well fast forward to the age of 14 where she changed school and we didnt stay in touch after that but stupid me was still afraid that she doesnt love me back so i tried to simply forget about her and had so many relationships and dated alot of other girls and loved some of them but still she remains in my brain untill this day although i'm currently in a relationship and i love my current girlfriend and i'm loyal but Emma is simply something else and it doesnt have anything to do with beauty or that shit because my girlfriend is also very pretty but Emma is so special i love the way she talks, the way she behaves and how she acts i have never ever looked at her and though ohhh damn she is fine although she is pretty but such thoughts dont come to mind when i think about her

well anyway two years ago i was drunk ( and Stupid ) and i texted her on facebook ( because we currently live in seperate countries ) and i told her that i loved her all my life and that i'm sick of having this idea in my brain because it is killing me and i said now that i got it out i'm done with you ( i was kind of upset ) and i blocked her.

My Question now what should i do, please i'm desprate fro advice i love her with all my heart and i want nothing from this life but to be with her
so how can i fix this and what should i do ??

PS: Sorry for writing too much :/