Already know its not a good idea to work with spouse...

My husband approached me tonight with me working FOR him. Weve talked about it in the past, but it was prevelant tonight. I know my Dr wont be practicing much longer but I had plans for another job. He proposes a great deal to me, but Im hesistant right away and tell him so. Driving to work together spending the day together and driving home and then the nights together. I dont like the idea already. Although the pay is great, the flip side to me is not a good outcome. But he thinks the opposite. It would be good for us. WHAT????

He knows Im looking to buy a new car, an Elantra. And he calls me later to suggest he'd pay for the difference to buy a nicer car. Because thats the car we'd use. UH the idea for me is to maintain my independance here and where does that go?

I truly believe this would be a HUGE mistake. What if things blow up at work? What if we do divorce and then what happens to MY car that I wanted????

Holy shit, my gut instinct and mind tell me NO WAY. I feel like he's trying to rope me in here and control me in some way. He poses it differently of course, but the way our relationship is right now I just dont feel this is a good idea?

I think you guys already know and will tell me DONT DO IT, just need some outside perspectives or affirmations that I what I feel is right?

I am probably not the best person to give out advice, but to me it sounds like he IS trying to rope you in and hold you on a tight leash. Sound like a contract...and personally, I wouldn't do it. ;)

I doubt he has bad intentions in mind. (Boy, you guys are suspicious!) He probably genuinely thinks it would be a good idea. Some couples DO work together, and it seems to be fine.

However, I wouldn't be able to do it.

I dont think when he thought it through it was malicious. But I wonder...Ive been out a few weeks and do like my freedom again. I just dont think I can do this. I love working with people where I can be myself, there theyre all attorneys and I hate to put this label but theyre uptight. EWW, I like to screw around and I wont have that luxury there. Let alone no one to vent to about things.

I cant do this, now its finding a way to tell him I dont feel comfortable with it without him getting pissy. I NEED ME time.

I still feel a little fishy about it all. Im not taking this bate. Good intentions or not I just dont see anything positive coming out of this.

Just the other day I witnessed a Dr and his wife works for him, they got into a huge fight!! What fun is that and how do you seperate it? Ive always suggested people not work together like that and here i am in a situation.

It seems men often like this idea better than women. They must really love their wives to want to spend so much time with them!

I think problems at work, no matter how small they are, would become problems in your out of work life. It would cause unnecessary tension on your relationship.

simply put, he's all nice now but doesn't he suffer from a bi-polar disorder?? the truth was already broken before so how is it any different now??

raverboy

You all are so right! I knew it and felt it too. This is not good for ME!

Raver I wonder about the bipolar being part of this, he had stated lastnight he wasnt feeling so down, but also he said the bipolar keeps him from producing at levels he should. Lack of motivation, managing his time better, etc and this is where my job would come in.

Im going to tell him this weekend this isnt something I need to worry about now and have other plans for myself when my boss retires.

Im no fortune teller but geezuz I dont need a crystal ball to tell me this is a bad idea!

Don't do it.

Ok so I sought out some advice from some older gentlemen. They said to take it as a huge compliment. Chris had called me earlier and said I wouldnt be working for him but with him, as partners. Because I have the strengths he doesnt. We could produce double. So Im actually contemplating it. But not for a few months at the very least. This would be on MY terms with certainty. Damn less hours and more money. No more household financial obligations.

time to brew in my thoughts...

Do it.








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Originally Posted by squirrley [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Raver I wonder about the bipolar being part of this, he had stated lastnight he wasnt feeling so down, but also he said the bipolar keeps him from producing at levels he should. Lack of motivation, managing his time better, etc and this is where my job would come in.

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Oh, HELL no! That's not your job. You are his wife, not his ****ing life coach. Not his emotional crutch.

This all sounds very familiar. My ex wanted me to work for him too. He was barking mad, and so is your hubby.

Resist.

Gigabitch says:

"Resist."

resistance is futile.

Im going to ponder the idea more. I told him today it was off the table for several months. Ive had too many life changes in the last month and half and this is NOT one I want to make now.

Resistance is futile, Im so tired of the Enterprise and the Borg, its what he's watching now..:bored:

not to rain on anyone's parade, but i'm drunk right now and happy!!

ahaha well i'm waiting for my friend to pick me up and we shall hit up the next bar.

raverboy