I have a crush on an introverted guy, we've been talking for a while and he's showed me signs that he's interested in me.. today i tried hinting at him that i like him back but once i did the conversation stopped immediately and he didn't respond until i sent another message..and then he changed the subject all together..
so did i get the wrong message? or does he like me but is afraid now that i've showed interest back??
can someone help me please?
Introverts likes to keep things slow. I know this cause i am one.
Does he display vulnerabilities to you? Does he speak openly about his personal things?
If he doesn't you still haven't gained his trust, we can also ask things to test you when we start feeling something.
We need time to process and think how to proceed (we always overthink), never force him to love you and be patience.
Anyways this is my opinion and it is how i proceed and connect to people.
thank you for replying.
yes he does speak sometimes about personal things; things he's afraid of, his favourite songs..
also can you please explain what you mean by "we can also ask things to test you when we start feeling something"? I am curious :).
Well i don't know if it is a typical thing of introverts there are different types, but in my case when i am interested and i already opened to you i tend to make more questions than is common.
You see small chat bothers me and it can be quite dis-comfortable, it is predictable it drains our precious energy, we prefer deeper discussions otherwise it is not challenging to our brain and i just detach of those kind of people i found the conversations dull.
I would paint scenarios, what if someone... do this , what would you do if .., or make up situations (i do this, to know if you would accept me as i am) . This is how i deal with it and maybe it has nothing to do with introvert, i wrote We on that post instead of I, my bad i generalized this is how i deal with my feelings not "We".
But this way i can analyse and have a big impression of what you feel on certain matters, and that would build me enough confidence to get out of my bubble.
And sometimes you need to be patience it took 3 months with my ex (i was always avoiding meeting with her because was afraid she would hurt me or just say no/ im the anxious type of introvert) but then all that was needed was to be direct and ask when that happened i felt ready like she already knew me and i knew what i could expect (but i couldn't do the first move that is why it took this much).
I never seen her personally we always texted, when she arrived near me to greet me i kissed her in the mouth, not even a simple Hi hehe.
Anyways we deal with things differently, but when we trust WE DO, WE ARE LOYAL AND BEST FRIENDS and remember Introverts also needs his space, understand this don't force, if he real likes you he is going to do things that he is not comfortable for YOU and step out of his bubble.
Oh i understand now, and it was really brave of you to kiss her when you met hehe :) thank you again for replying :)
Introvert here. Shyness and introversion often go together. While I was really shy, I did improve that a lot, but I will always be an introvert.
So yes, introverts, who are very shy, can be terrified of someone judging them or rejecting them. What this means is you have to sit him down in a quiet, happy place (a place introverts would be comfortable in), and if you want to date him, then make that crystal clear. You can say "I'd like to date you, can I take you to the movies Friday night?" You will have to get the ball rolling. Then at the movies you will have to hold his hand to show your interest.
If you want to encourage him, be real clear what you want. Say "I'd like it if you kissed me." Don't say "Well?"
One thing that worked with me is I just wasn't clear if a girl wanted to date me. So she said, "So, are you going to ask me out?" And that was clear enough.
> I have a crush on an introverted guy, we've been talking for a while
Talking is not flirting. You didn't flirt with him so he's not sure if you want to date him.
> today i tried hinting at him that i like him back
Don't hint, be direct with introverts. They have a hard time with rejection, as they are often more sensitive emotionally (as I am).
> or does he like me but is afraid now that i've showed interest back??
Your message was not clear enough to be received by him. So be more clear. Ask him on a date and use the word "date".
And yes, introverts like to go fairly slow. Unfortunately things can also stall sometimes, so you have to help by moving things along.
Lol give the guy a chance. Take it slow. Go with the flow. And see what happens.
Yes I will run away too. Do take things slow. Don’t rush forward and scare him