Should I try to move on or try again?
So I’ve known this girl since I was 10 years old and for the last two years of high school we were in alot of the same classes so we talked every day and pretty quickly I had a crush on her. I mean I just connected with her on a level that I just haven’t with any other girl I’ve met before. She’s smart, beautiful, we have the same sense of humour. I felt that she was perfect for me. So anyway one of my best friends was always telling me that he was sure she liked me too because of the way she was always teasing me etc. and I was sure she did too, but I was just to ****ing awkward and nervous to tell her because I was afraid she’d shoot me down. Then when school started back after summer she had a boyfriend. She was happy with him and I didn’t want to be a dick and break them up or anything so I didn’t try anything.
I was filled with so much regret that I’d missed my chance to tell her how I felt about her because now she was happy with someone else. We still talked a lot and I was still in love with her but she was still with the other guy. So our high school graduation comes around and there’s a party at a club for everyone in the year and we talk for a bit and then she kisses me (she initiates it), which I was kinda stunned by. I didn’t really see her for the rest of the night after that. The next time I saw her was about a month later at a dance. She was there with her boyfriend but he was with his friends or something. We talked for a bit and she wanted me to dance with her (I’m not much of a dancer put I put some effort in). After the song ended she leaned in and kissed me on the cheek and said then said “Sorry that was something that I just had to do”. She walked away before I could say anything and I didn’t see her again for the rest of the night.
We ended up going to different colleges so I didn’t really see her anymore, even though she only lives about 15 minutes away. I only saw her about twice after that at mutual friend’s parties but she was with her boyfriend both times.
It’s now about 11 months since I’ve seen/spoke to her, our social circles just haven’t overlapped since I guess, but I’m still hung up on her. One of my friends told me that she broke up with her boyfriend recently, but I feel since it’s been so long that I just don’t know how I’d start talking to her again. I still love with her, and it just makes me angry with myself for not telling her when I had the chance. And now that she’s single again, I feel that we’ve been out of touch for too long for me to be able to do anything about it. I keep telling myself that I’m just going to have to get over her but I just don’t know whether to give up or to figure out how to try again.
Anyone got any advice or experience anything similar?
Sorry it’s so long btw
