Afraid of falling in love?
I'll try to keep a 2 year story short. I met a girl at my former job 2 years ago. We started sending eachother textmessages, we became close friends. Her mom had died and 1 year ago my father also past the way, so we undertstood eachother in a great way. There was so much chemistry and we had our first date about 1,5 year ago. Tried to kiss her but he didnt want to. I had all reason to believe she liked me but she wanted to "just be friends".
Okay we kept in touch a lot and i felt in love with her and eventually I even started loving her. As a friend, as a lady. But I never showed my feelings too much, afraid of losing her. It turned out to be the right choise, the last 6 months we started getting closer then ever talking till 4 am in the night (on the phone and MSN). Sooo much chemistry never got bored talking 2 eachother.
Then we had a date 3 months ago and FINALLY the thing I had been waiting for for 2 years happened. We had a very romantic diner we hold hands we stared into each others eyes I saw the love in her eyes. The tension was very high and then the most beautiful thing happened. She said she felt more than friendship and kissed me and hugged me like never before. It was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. After waiting and dreaming about that kiss for two years it finnaly happened.
Ok everything ok we went on holiday for like 2 months but missed eachother like crazy and when i got back things seemed the same.
But the other night we were talkin and she said: "I want to forget that night and lets just be friends". I tried to be cool about it and respect her decission
Now that night (when we kissed) i saw she was happy why does she want to forget such a special moment. She has never been in love and is afraid to do so, so every time someone comes really close to her she just cuts it off before it even starts to get serious, i think she is a virgin also. She is 22 I'm 23. I love her more than anything in the world she is my sunshine ,my happyness i want to make her happy, I never told her I love her soo but she knows i have feelings for her. If I tell her i love her know i'll just push her away since she is afraid of love. But on the other hand i waited patiently for 2 years and when it finnaly seemed she was ready for it she just starts the same thing all over again. opportunities like this only come a few times in a life time i think she is makin a mistake.maybe its because of her study, she is really busy with her lawschool and thats more important than love to her. I have had a lot of girlfriends but i love her more than all of them. Its more then being in love. But what can I do, she wants to forget the night that we showed eachother our love...She said that kissing was a misstake, cant believe it, it wasnt just a kiss it was a passionate loving kiss and she was the one who kissed me not the other way around. Well if i lose her i still have the memory of having kissed the lady i loved more than anything in life. Can someone give me some advise on this? She is a very complicated person.
