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Originally Posted by
HeartIsAching
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Not according to mental health experts.
Oh really?
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Brad Sagarin et al (2009):
The implication of two studies at the Northern Illinois University into hormonal changes associated with Sadomasochistic activities including spanking, bondage and flogging, suggest that it could bring consenting couples closer together. The increases in relationship closeness combined with the displays of caring and affection observed as part of the SM activities offer support for the modern view that SM, when performed consensually, has the potential to increase intimacy between participants.
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Cross and Matheson (2006):
Cross and Matheson (2006) found no support for the traditional theories that sadomasochism is an illness.
The researchers found no evidence for the psychopathology/medical-model contention that masochists suffer from any kind of mental disorder and that SM-sadists are antisocial (Krafft-Ebing 1886/1965).
There was no support for the traditional psychoanalytic view of self-harming and guilt-ridden masochists or id-driven and psychopatic SM-sadists (Freud 1900/1906/1953/1954).
Cross and Matheson neither found any evidence for Baumeister’s contention that masochists were more inclined to engage in escapist behaviors such as drug-taking, day-dreaming, or fantasizing than the comparison group (Baumeister 1988, 1989).
Cross and Matheson did however find that SM participants were overall more likely than non-SM respondents to report bisexual/homosexual orientations.
No evidence was found suggesting that sadomasochists espoused anti-feminist, patriarchal values or traditional gender roles to a greater extent that the non-SM-group.
And the sadomasochists were relatively more likely to be in ongoing relationships than the comparison group.
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Connolly et al (2006):
Results from a research project by Dr. Pamela Connolly et al, among a group with bondage and sadomasochistic interests (BDSM) showed that
“no evidence was found to support the notion that clinical disorders - including depression, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsion - are more prevalent among the sample of individuals with BDSM interests than among members of the general population. Moreover, this sample did not show evidence of widespread PTSD, trauma-related phenomena, personality disturbances, psychological sadism or psychological masochism”, disorders in which the sufferer either derives pleasure out of genuine cruelty (not the play-acting kind) or compulsively seeks out harmful levels of pain. ”Similarly, no prominent themes were found in a series of profile analyses.”
”There were, however, som exceptions to this general pattern, most notably the higher-than-average levels of nonspecific dissociative symptoms and narcissism in this sample. That said, this body of findings suggests that, contrary to longstanding assumptions in the psychoanalytic literature, there is very little support for the view that psychopathology underlies behavior.”
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Richters et al 2005:
A survey using computer-assisted telephone interviews with 20,000 Australian men and women, showed that BDSM may actually make men happier. Men into BDSM scored significantly better on a scale of psychological wellbeing than other men.
BDSM’ers were no more likely to have suffered sexual difficulties, sexual abuse or coercion or anxiety than other Australians.
- This seems to imply that these men are actually happier as a result of their behaviour, though we're not sure why, said Dr. Juliet Richters, of the University of New South Wales. “It might just be that they're more in harmony with themselves because they're into something unusual and are comfortable with that. There's a lot to be said for accepting who you are.”
Researchers said the study helps break down the reigning stereotype that people into bondage and discipline were damaged as children and were therefore “dysfunctional”.
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Martins & Ceccarelli (2003):
A study, presented at the 16th World Congress of Sexology in Cuba 10-14 March, 2003, suggests that non-conventional sexual practices cannot be used as a diagnosed criteria of any kind, which means that the only aspect that distinguishes these individuals from others is their sexual practices.
An interest in BDSM isn't an illness you should be seeking to cure with therapy. It's not a manifestation of some horrendous childhood trauma any more than being gay is a result of being abandoned by your father at a young age (or whatever other crap people used to believe about homosexuality). It's just one facet of your sexuality, and you can do with it as you will. Share it with your husband or not, but what you won't be able to do is stop yourself having these fantasies - the sooner you accept it as part of who you are the better.