Originally Posted by
inexistent_love
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Following is love as i see and hope it provides an aspect of love you may consider or at least tell you how someone on this earth sees it. It's going to be too long though because it's in the form of a letter I wrote to my love, who didn't read it and will never do.
"What is love? I see you taking aback by the gravity of the question. Are you really expecting to find an answer for something baffled humanity all along and is yet to fall on the magical definition? was your sarcastic response. Well darling, who said I was looking for what humanity thinks, all I wanted was to know your own thinking and nobody else. With all due respect to the rest of the universe, all I care for is you and only you. Besides, you speak about humanity as it represents one entity with identical desires, properties, needs, thinking, beliefs and feelings. Have you noticed the crescent tonight? couldn’t you see it changes seat with the change of yours? You could in one night enjoy its warm look, if you cared for some warmth, on your left, right and even before you, merely influenced by your own angle and only yours. At the same moment the spellbinding shine could be reflected to many other sights from completely different skies. And assuming true the universe is one; then in your heart I would equal my competition, wouldn’t I?
Since you insist to wait humanity’s consensus and since I can’t wait, let me tell you what love is! Not forgetting of course it doesn’t represent but own experience. Why would I care to know your view, all I cared always for was your competition and none else? Yes darling, I am very well aware of the fact; however until my competition, all of them, come up with one, it wouldn’t hurt to hear a ready one, made up especially for you in order to have something to compare with when time dictates such comparison. Remembering too I would never care to be the winner of best definition, assuming there could be such one. Why? Because at then I would have lost despite the outcome, therefore you wouldn’t mind listening to a loser just for a purposeless fun at least. But haven’t I heard your futile fun hundreds of times already? No darling, what you have known so far was yourself, ever since I have been defining you for both you and myself. I remember very well your ridiculing words of such definition, and in spite of my words putting you on a pedestal, I had lost, which partly explains the prophesy. By the way, I have never done such thing of putting you on any pedestal; all I did was to put you in the place you had deserved and for you to reject to acknowledge my heart’s placement is totally understandable. Being the only one, in your earth, to promote you to the highest acme, I must be the one wrong and not everyone else!
I thought you were interested in my definition, yet I see you now offering yours, be consistent for once at least, will you? Hopefully this going to be your last objection before hearing what I have for you today! Well, it doesn’t matter who says what, don’t entwined souls look at life from one angle? even though on one, of them, alone the burden lays to carry the twosome nearest to that acme. So, are you tired objecting every claim I make? then relax and listen to my claim of what is love. I like to say first what is not love, and no I am not escaping the task I assigned myself voluntarily. In order for my mind to identify something, it has to cast aside all the seemingly similar objects by testing their unlikely probability until proven otherwise.
Physical attraction is certainly not love and no this isn’t that boring cliché or idealistic philosophy that you hear sometimes, or an attempt to sound a perfectionist to gain any favour in your heart. I hope you don’t get shocked from the coming admission, however to clarify my point I have no other choice but say it. It happened, at times that I got physically attracted with no love or a trace of it ever felt for my heart to claim it as such, whereas in your case the sole emotion that had invaded same heart was something in the least unknown, completely mysterious and unheard of before. In the first case wasn’t an issue for the heart to recognize and contain, merely straightforward feeling where pure sensation would be the first name the mind settles on without having to contemplate then brush off as, even though, enthralling still inexplicably extraterrestrial. The most difficult task this mind had ever undertaken was to come to an agreement with the heart on a something worldly parallel that could be used as a reference point for a reasonable comparison. Long time and extensive efforts it took to point finger to the real object. You would wonder and say; ok if it was not sensational feeling then it had to be love, either one or the other, what is the alleged confusion for? In fact this was the strangest thing; love was never a suspect in this simple equation. Unthinkable, even in my wildest dreams, was to either get attracted physically to you or fall in love with you. As I said many times before, satisfying the eyes via external look had been the starting point to convince my heart to consider searching what is behind. Again this is not to diminish your fine look. My mind, due to a flaw in its make, unfortunately fails to believe in anything less than the perceived outstanding, and even an unsatisfactory image painted by an outspoken mirror has failed to erase the conflicting criteria drawn within irrational lenses. Hence you can appreciate the anxiety and unease my heart had suffered in order to solve the mystery in you. Perhaps it was neither a good explanation nor convincing to conclude love and sexual desire are unrelated, yet you have proven it to be the case.
Is love a gravitational force towards an appealing object that occurs regardless of sensual need? If it was the case, it would have had to occur at the initial encounter from the first glance. Since it wasn’t the case, I can presume that love and appeal have no connection. This must be an out of whack conclusion! You whispered to yourself. As it has been indisputable fact this type of love and doesn’t exist who hasn’t, at some point in life, felt its force. Let me remind you that I don’t deny some form of affection at first glance, however my own conclusion it could be anything but love and we have agreed on seeing love from our angle while forgetting the rest of the universe, haven’t we?
Is love an emotional need? Emotional need is a by-product of love and not love. The heart has to feel love first while emotional need for someone happens next, what comes first dictates the relationship title, we don’t feel an emotional need for someone we don’t love, do we? When I saw you first and for long time thereafter, I had not felt any need of any type, rather I spent the months that elapsed, until the moment of truth, on deciphering the atypical waves transmitted from your heart throughout the surroundings.
Is love a selfish phenomenon? Life is too sad and gloomy with the absence of mutual emotions, and very depressive it becomes if the other side has not experienced the same; each wants to be loved as much. Well, I have never cared even for a single second to receive something in return, my sole interest had always been to let you know what you represented to me, and in fact I enjoy a lot the reality of one-sided love. If it was a mutual one, I won’t be able to display the power of mine. If the two sides posses a comparable strength, they counterbalance each other, neither is going to appreciate the great emotion of the other. Only the weak is capable to feel the strength of the opposite side. In the end would be needless to explain how I feel since you do feel a similar one!
Love is sensing a heavenly existence of oneself inside another. The above forms are true facts of daily life and denying their forceful prevalence is like refusing to admit self existence. Their power is extracted from an earthly nature with earth a fertile soil to grow into forests that can hardly allow rays of love to break through and establish self as a parallel force that would help soul restore nature as a soaring balloon to defeat weight, and pull the body up to where it could see reality from a higher world without having to break self into body and soul. Love is a proof that a more beautiful form of myself is existent on earth. Strange that witnessing a higher form of myself embodied in another is not a reason for envy and denial. Rather falling onto a better copy of myself gazing at me through your eyes triggered the best feeling ever. Is it possible to forget the best of me or cease to love and write to? wouldn’t this be a word of death on my existence?
This explains the baffled state of my mind when it had encountered your phenomenon and the inability to fathom it. It wasn’t easy for it to believe the probability of seeing self-image while not facing a mirror. Together with an enormous affection filled my heart gradually for you; I had to wonder the spooky nature surrounding you. Finally it was a matter of one shocking instant to recognize the one hiding underneath you"
