To Stay Married - LOVE, BE HAPPY, Initiate, Swallow, Learn to Love Sex.

Women,

I just got divorced because I was self centered, grumpy all the time and gave my husband sex once or twice a year after he begged constantly. Then he quit begging. Then he started carrying on with other women. I had a great life but didn't know it. I had all the material things.... but you don't even need that to have a great life. You need your family and that's all you need. Now I'm 50 and alone. He's 50 and with a 35 year old who is appreciative, affectionate, attractive, and gives him sex when he wants it and asks all the time if he wants it. (He told me.) She's everything that I'm not.

I'm not going to bother being bitter toward him because even my daughter said she couldn't blame him because I was always in a bad mood and yelling at him. What a legacy I've left, huh? My children remember me being a battle ax who made them all miserable. I think this is a spreading epidemic across the nation and it's pretty sad.

If you are a woman that wants to be and stay married then you had better do what you need to do and you know when you don't you are getting away with something. These are the unwritten rules that mothers should be teaching their daughters. If you want to live another way then stay single. I could have a been a different person and not a spoiled brat. Now the family the split and when the grands come they will be here and there and we won't all be together. whooppeeee.

I'd rather not swallow, is my choice, sucking his cock is more than enough of a good thing for him( whatever him)

Well... Ya know what they say: "The difference between Love and Like is Swallow and spit."

Op: Have you gotten any therapy to help you out of being this bitter bean that you have been for most of your adult life? There is an underlying reason why you are the way you are. Don't be afraid to get some help with that. You too can change and find a good man that you can grow old(er) with and be more content with once you figure out why you are so miserable in general.

I think it is great and healthy that you can admit when you have a problem, and that you can admit your part of the fault in the end of your relationship. Too many people get too wrapped up in thinking they are so perfect and could do no wrong. They hurl all the blame at the other person and fail to learn from their own mistakes.

Here's the thing.....

So you admit you made mistakes that helped to cause the destruction of your relationship. ....You weren't the only person in that relationship. It is NEVER okay to run around on your significant other. He can act like you drove him to it all he wants, but that doesn't make it okay whether or not it is true. When something goes wrong in your relationship, you either work to fix it, or you end the relationship.

You may feel you wronged him. You may be right, you may not, but the bottom line is he wronged you too. All that said, don't let me discourage you from trying to improve yourself if you do feel that is needed. It takes a strong person to admit when they have done something wrong, and an even stronger person to do something to fix it. Hopefully you can do whatever you need to do to help yourself no longer be so negative. Really, you owe it to yourself as much as anybody else. You deserve to be happy just as much as anybody else would. You need to learn how to pursue that happiness without falling into the same traps that sabotaged it before. Good luck to you.