Falling for him again. Help!
Four years ago, when I was 18, I met my friend B also 18. After about a year of friendship I really started to like him. The thing is, four years ago I was afraid to be in a relationship with anyone so I didn't let myself completely fall for him. I knew he liked me, but neither of us ever told each other. After a few months I started to like his best friend, A also 18. To be honest though it wasn't a huge crush, and I still liked B. That didn't stop me though. I completely fell in love with him anyway (at least i think so!). For the past three years A and I have been living together, and have been happy until recently. He's acts like an immature little boy and plays video games all the time. He doesn't hug me or kiss me anymore, or tells me he loves me. I don't feel the love from him anymore, despite my efforts to get it out of him. We have been to counseling for our relationship, but it as also failed. He doesn't want to end our relationship, and I'm too scared to do it. Anyway, B is still around and we see him all the time, which is where my problem starts. All that is on my mind these days is, "Why did I turn away from him? Why was I so scared to be with him but not with A?? Have these last three years with A been nothing but a way to cover up my feelings for B?" I am starting to fall for him again and I feel that I can't help it. I am so lost lately and it's starting to effect me at work. I ended up crying in the bathroom last week after A and B came in, and B came up and talked to me instead of A. Stupid I know, but it was just a reminder of all of this crap. I don't know what to do. I don't feel like A cares for me anymore. Also, I have been getting the feeling that B is starting to like me again too. We haven't flirted, but we have been talking more than usual and he's been extra nice to me too. Maybe it's because he sees how A has been ignoring me and he feels bad? What ever it is, it's not helping how I'm feeling. Has anyone ever been in a similar situation? What did you do? Any advice for me? I'm so tired of feeling this way.
