I love my bestfriends lover.

So, my bestfriend Anna has had this "crush" I guess you could say, on this one guy named Ryan, Ok, it's more than just a crush, I think she may have been in love with him/still is. A year ago, they started sleeping with each other, and no relationship ever came out of it, but she was persistent and continued to sleep with him. Even though it was a year ago since they've slept together, he is still in our "group of friends" and they see each other on the weekends, anyway, the whole time they had their little fling, he always flirted with me and Anna always got mad at me, and he would find her to be crazy. Recently, he's been talking to me a lot, and I've been getting to know him, but I don't want to tell her because she would probably hate me, and probably cry and we wouldn't be friends. We text each other pretty much everyday, and get close when she's not around. I'm starting to fall for this guy, but I know I'm not supposed to. He's asked me to dinner and I had to (although I really wanted to say yes) refuse. I don't know if I should just stop talking to him, or if I should just go with what I want, because I know I'd be happy. HELP!?

Talk to your friend about how she feels. Is she in a relationship with him? does he like her? If you can't have a mature discussion with your friend about this, then she's not a very good friend.

what if your mother had sex with your lover?? it's pretty much the same scenario...

raverboy

How do you know he's not looking for just another fling with you? This guys' track record doesn't seem very good since he pretty much used your friend and tossed her away. Now you want to move in and scoop up this player? Good luck with that :P

Before you start anything up with this guy, be absolutely sure he is worth losing your friend over, because you WILL lose her.

These kinds of situations piss me off. You're actually considering something that will inflict incredible pain on your best friend. You get with this guy and then what? You date for a while. Maybe a few months. Maybe a year. End of story. Your best friend, meanwhile, a person who could have been in your life forever, is left betrayed and heartbroken.

Why do people do shit like that?

he's a player and you're whats known as a bitch



i know the truth probably hurts....but it's nasty whats going on

If you truly care about your 'best friend', I dont see how you can even consider going out with this guy. She's infatuated with him. You should probably stop talking to him.

And like Starbuck said, he sounds like a player. He's using her. What makes you think he won't end up treating you the same way he treats her?

if i were your friend i would have to kick your ass.

Thank you. I know that it's wrong, but I needed somebody to tell me. I appreciate your guys' honesty.

Blondee, you're the first person I've ever seen come here, take advice that isn't just a lot of empty encouragement, and actually appreciate it. Most people would bitch incessantly and leave in a fit. Kudos.