A male point of view needed on this situation, have we both got a commitment phobia?

I approached someone who I really liked via a text to tell them how I felt. After 18 months of keeping in touch via the texting (with some sexting) I was asked for a topless pic from him.

Since I sent the topless pic, we have become closer and I have sent more topless pics.

8 weeks ago he sent me a dic pic and has started to phone me and we have had phone sex several times. I told him that I wanted to meet up with him and he has agreed but has said that it will only be 4 or 5 times and he is not prepared to leave his partner, who he has been with for 18 years and doesn't live with her.

He seems to be under the impression that he is 'helping' me out by relieving my sexual frustration ( I am in a sexless relationship) but is this because he is in denial, or frightened or what?

Most people do not want to leave their marriage....he's being straight with you he doesn't want to leave her, and that what you have is a simple casual fun thing to fill what has been missing in the relationship...that's it. You are reading too much into what this truly is....just an affair/something on the side.

if you want more than dirty pics and phone sex/sexting tell him and if what he is offering you is no longer enough, find someone in your area to be intimate even if a fwb relationship at least they will be more available to you then a dude with a wife not living in your town.

You seem to think the issue lies with him, but it lies with you. It has gotten to a point where you are not getting what you want, and what he is offering isn't enough, so you should be saying to him and yourself, this isn't fulfilling my expectations so I need to move on and find someone who does.