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She had sex with him before she even had a conversation about what his end goal was or probably before she even knew his last name.
Wow, did you even read this whole thread? I absolutely knew his last name (that was a dick statement to make) along with many other personal details about him and his family...we did talk, for a week about many things, like a normal couple would do to get to know each other. Did we analyze what this was going to be? No. I don't think either one of us knew at that point.
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He ****ing DID TELL her in his actions. They got together for sex and just because he spent an hour or two watching t.v. with her and talking about the weather is doesn't meant that those were, in any way actions of love.
I never took them as acts of love. We both have busy schedules, so we didn't have much time to spend together.....but I didn't just walk in, strip down, fukc then leave. He was attentive in other ways....holding my hand, rubbing my feet, snuggling with me....all things a normal couple would do....and we talked about our jobs, our lives, our friends, our kids......
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He was never her's to bail on... her actions clearly told him that she was jiggy with the dynamic. When she did mistake her lust for love (there's an 80's song about that) and voice a "where is this going convo" he didn't lie to her in the least. After she knew his stance on their sexual relationship she was desperate enough from lack of lust she text him "I miss you." It's women that do such things that keep players, playing.
I agree, he was never mine...and my actions showed him that I was more than happy to do what we were doing.....when I told him how I felt, which was more than lust, and asked if there was a future.....he did and didn't lie..... He said he couldn't answer the question about a future together because he wasn't 100% sure how he felt....I think that was a lie....he used that to keep me hanging....and to keep me in his bed. He then said, the next day, that I was, in fact, just a booty call. That I think was the truth. I heard the lies.
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You have to stop using that old dogma of "he/she was used no one forced her to **** a guy on the first meet alone. She volunteered and she kept going back for more sex without acts of love in the mix. That's a mutual decision between two adults wherein one got expectations and the other did not.
I personally don't think he USED me. I was a willing participant, I liked the guy and I like sex. Again, I knew the guy.....it's not like we met that morning and we had sex that evening and I fell in love because of it. There was more to it. I did keep going back...and we did keep having sex....but he never made me feel like that was all it was....was it a romantic fairy tale? No....but it also wasn't like you're portraying it....he never did me and kicked me out of his bed....I wasn't treated like a whore. He always asked me to stay the night...I never did. I still really believe that he should have at least warned me about his FWB life style. Maybe he originally was open to more and like I said, he spent some time with me, and I just wasn't right for him in a long term way...but we did have good dynamics in bed. I did have expectations. I did develop feelings.....and I could have walked away....but my heart wouldn't let me. He could have walked away but his dick wouldn't let him. Sums up how differently men and women think.
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And BTW, they were both using each other and they both got what they want which was the sex. She even admitted that she wanted to have sex with him even the first time they got together.
Yeah, I did, but I wasn't using him for sex...I was attracted to him and he was to me....is that not the normal progression of things?.......some people sleep together on the first date and end up married for many years....or they end up never seeing each other again...or they end up like me somewhere stuck in the middle. As for getting back with him....I have sent one text in a week to which he did not respond. I don't see me bumping into eachother...our lives are too different and we don't have mutual friends. I'm just going to go by the old saying...if it was meant to be......you never know what tomorrow may bring.