Ex got pregnant straight after we broke up
I met my gf just over 3.5 years ago, even though there is an age gap we were crazy about each other the first year , even though it was long distance most of the time we still got to spend sometimes as long as a couple of months living together or else even a weekend every 6-8 weeks, but we talked constantly on the phone.
As we entered the second year we argued a lot,long distance is hard and she enjoyed her weekends out partying with her friends but always swore I could trust her which I did to a point as I am a bit insecure due to a previous relationship, but as this girl was obsessed with me in her own words I trusted her.
Then after two years my contract was up and I had to go back to Europe, I promised her I would be back and I genuinely meant it, but once I get back home it was harder to talk as much with the time difference then she started to get really crazy jealous and we started arguing like crazy, with both of us saying really hurtful stuff , till in the heat of the moment we broke up, over the next 6 months even though we had broken up we constantly talked, with her always initiating it but it always ended with her asking to get back with me and I would tell her I love her but we needed time apart as I found it hard to forgive her for constantly trying to get my attention with status updates of different guys, by this stage both of us were dating different people.
Then I got a job offer again in the states ,I went over and she met me at the airport which I didn’t ask for but straight away we took up where we left off, even though we were only going to see each other for a weekend each month at first, the following month I came and stayed at her house for a week and she came and stayed with me the next month.
I was really happy and all those niggling doubts I had about her I started to ignore, she told me how heartbroken she was when I left and how much it affected her and I genuinely felt really bad, I totally crushed her, so I started being a lot more thoughtful, we still had our rows but we had this really strong connection where we both knew each other and never let the rows simmer too long.
Things were going as well as they ever were and she told me she was so happy, then one weekend when we had not seen each other in 4 weeks we had a silly argument about her not calling me back which escalated into bringing up old stuff about the year we spend apart and we broke up again.
A week later I realised I missed her, I called her and told her this, she told me she was scared I was going to go home again like last year and leave her and she would get hurt again, I promised her this would not happen again and that we can go on holiday together next month and come home to Europe with me for the holidays, she agreed, but over the next few weeks we could never get the consistency back and just kept arguing with her going out of her way to let me down and we constantly broke up and got back together, with her saying she needed to be left alone then saying she was afraid of getting her heart broken again.
I asked her up front if she had been with anybody else, just say the word and I would walk away forever, but she said no and swore that there was nobody,then after another row I finally I gave up and walked away for good I thought.
1 week later she started constantly calling me and messaging me, she told me how much she missed me but I told her she had her chance, she kept at it until I softened up and we had a really long chat ,a real heart to heart and everything came out, she told me she could no longer do long distance and that she would marry me today if that’s what I wanted, I told her we needed to take things slow so let’s see how we go on holidays together, then we can make plans for her to move out to me.
Then today she called me said she had something to tell me, out of the blue she told me last week she had an abortion, the baby wasn't mine and it was with some guy she had met , she insisted this was while we were broke up and seemed to think we could work through this, I screamed abuse at her and told her I never want to see her again.
I know if I had of made a solid commitment to her and not have left it this late this would not have happened but in the 6 weeks since we started arguing I constantly tried to get her back and made promises to her, now I am gutted, maybe she met him while we were still together I don’t know she insists she didn’t.
I had walked away from her last 2 weeks ago, at this time she knew she was pregnant yet she chased me still, it would have been so much easier to let me go.
I know I was the only guy she has ever wanted to be with, I am the love of her life and I didn’t always show my feelings due to being hurt before but I feel I hate her at the moment and want revenge and never ever want to see her again, she is poison.
A female friend of mine has told me I am being too hard, she said this girl has laid her heart on the line for me and I crushed it, then didn't take the second chance I got ,she has made a mistake but I should be there for her or at least be civil.
