My boyfriend and I fight ( almost ) everyday what to do?

Hey,

Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 6 months.
Last 2 months we have been fighting almost everyday.
Usually I would get slightly irritated by the slightest things for example:
-He spends a little bit too much time with other girls.
-When I want to spend more time with him.
-When I had the feeling he'd only come over to me if he wanted something ( which wasn't true looking back at it ).

When I think back about why I got annoyed it where for the most stupid reasons, and I feel horrible after we fight.
Some of you are probably going to say we don't fit together but that's not what I'm starting this topic for.
I would like to know what I can do to stop the fighting.
Things I've tried:
-Walking away from it too calm down the irritations ( avoiding a conflict ).
-Instead of letting my emotions explode all at once, talking about most things that annoy me ( not all ).
-What bugs me, and his opinion ( instead of just apologizing and getting on with our lifes ).
-Not reacting on every little thing that happens.

Today we made a promise not to fight anymore, 'cause it's tearing me ( and him ) down.
Though I'm pretty sure that's not going to solve it, and I really love him, and don't want to break with him.

PS. He used to be a player ( he hasn't been for more then a year ), which is a reason that I'm easily jealous.

Thanks xxx Miyumi.

Harboring thoughts of resentment or irritation without expressing them straight away is a recipe for disaster: you will eventually "explode". Always communicate with him, as soon as you realize that something is upsetting you. Learn to use "I" statements when discussing something that upsets you, otherwise he might (and probably will) register anything you say as an accusation (even if it isn't). Avoid using terms like "always" or "never", they always make things worse and exaggerated. When talking about what's bothering you, use clear and explicit sentences. Provide a possible solution to the problem, and always try to empathize with him, making him understand that you're at least trying to see his side of the story.

Example:

"You always go out with your friends and leave me here alone, you don't care about me! You might as well say it! Go and have fun if that's what you want, I don't care!" - WRONG

"It makes me feel upset and undesired when you sometimes prefer to go out with your friends rather than staying here with me, but I understand you need your spaces, we all do :-). Maybe I could hang out with you and your friends sometimes?" - RIGHT

He still is a player if he is preferring to spend his time with other girls over you. If this just started a few months ago and it's getting worse, he is getting that itch again.

he shouldn't be spending time with other girls if you guys are in an exclusive relationship, I would be pissed about that too. I would do what searock said and let him know that it upsets you, if he continues this behavior then perhaps he isn't the right guy for you. he should be making more of an effort and it has only been 6 months, you should still be in the lovey dovey honeymoon period!

I bet money on it she fears if she does he is going to dump her.....then so be it....I'd say see ya later!

Hes still a player. Id dump him

Thank you all for your reactions.
@searock, I'll deffinitelly try that thank you alot.

And it has become less ( this has been going on for quite a while after all ) since the first time I told him.
Also, I've known him for 3 years ( we've been friends ) and he wasn't player-like at all around me ( other friends ).

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by smackie9 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I bet money on it she fears if she does he is going to dump her.....then so be it....I'd say see ya later!

---

I'm not sure what you're trying to say with that, but I'm not afraid of him dumping me. If that's how it's supposed to end then be it that way.
I just want to put some effort into it because I know it's worth it, and not regretting doing nothing later on.

xx Miyumi