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I'm currently looking into it actually. As far as a 'wake up' call, the whole legal proceedings surrounding it did that plenty.

Don't worry about it smackie, being able to come here and have people who will actually talk to me about what's going on has helped a lot.

I don't actually suffer from clinical depression, that's not what it is. The depression itself is a part of bipolar disorder, which taking anti depressants can actually make worse.

I have been...

That's actually the point of me continuing to come back to the thread here. I don't want sympathy or anything of that nature, just a place where I can talk about things when I need to.

First off, I'd like to say that I don't appreciate the way you devalue the importance of one's mental health. Just because it's a recently new discovery (just in the 20th century) doesn't mean it...

It's actually an email that I typed up, not a written letter.

Also, I'm fully aware of how unhealthy it is, along with everything else surrounding her that I went through.

I do believe if there was a restraining order, I would've been informed of such. Also, as I mentioned, I don't plan on sending it until the legal stuff is over and done with. My intention now is to...

I typed out an email that, as of right now, I intend to send to her after all the legal stuff surrounding me has been resolved, here's what it says.

Being stuck inside and unable to do a whole lot sucks. It ends up leaving me trapped within my own mind, which right now is a very dark place.

I go out for walks, but that doesn't help every time...

I sit here day in and day out, constantly angry and in pain. Logic and common sense all tell me the reality of the situation, but my emotions, my heart refuses to accept it. I keep trying to hold on...

That's right, or else that's exactly what I would be doing, for more reasons than just this situation.

Unfortunately I had a dream about her last night that really hurt. In it she forgave me for everything, said she loved me, embraced me and told me that she never wanted to let go. Waking up after...

Well, I've been doing my best to keep my mind occupied and for the most part it's worked. I have little break downs here and there when I'm alone with my thoughts.

Unfortunately now she's...

Well, I went about a week just shrugging it off and didn't have any problems. Now that all the legal stuff has been situated and I have no more anxiety over what's going to happen, since I pretty...

I'm not looking for a girlfriend, just friends really. I'm not good at having male friends, no idea why, just never have been. I'm in no place to be trying to form such a relationship right now.

I've actually been doing pretty well the past about 36 hours or so. I do keep coming back to it, mentally, every now and then, but so far I've been able to shake it by telling myself the truth about...

@ Oh: That really helped me a lot, thank you. Little did I know all I had to do was look into my OWN quote in my signature.

@ smackie: Thank you for the support. I started doing my graphics stuff...

Well I found out today that the charges aren't real bad. They revolve around my presenting myself as someone else who's a real person and obtaining personal/private materials from Tiffany under false...

@ Cerby: They simply could've said that to me because she was contacted by them (there's a lot of stuff on the computer pertaining to her, along with the photos and videos) and she asked them to tell...

@ smackie: You're absolutely right about the identity thing, unfortunately I've always been that way. I've always felt negative about myself, unfortunately. Being a person who isolates myself from...

I'd like to point out that I'm fully aware of how much I hurt someone I care so much about. I've gone over it so many times in my head and it's better for everyone, especially for her that I just...

It's been a long, LONG time since I've posted here.

I actually started a thread pertaining to the person I'm going to be talking about here:...