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I agree to this completely! Self preservation first.

Yup, agree with those that say to ask directly. Ask her out - give her the benefit of the doubt for a couple of postponements, but if that becomes a pattern of promises into future but no meet, then...

He could be an introverted guy, I guess. You may also gently provoke him by asking to tell more abouth what's he doing and things that you would like to chat about.