Hi girls, i need some serious advice here.
So I broke up with my girlfriend of 5 years because I was going through some serious depression and I couldn't talk to anyone about it, not her, not family not friends.. I explained why i broke up with her after seeking some advice/help with doctors a few months later and now I am in the best place I have ever been in my life apart from having her by my side.
2 months after the break up i tried to get her back but she informed me she had gone through too much pain and finally felt strong again and was becoming independent.
She informed me that she still wanted to be friends and remain in contact and catch up frequently because she still cares about me and didnt want to loose me as a friend. i agreed to this however it has been killing me because i still love her and just want her back.
several months have passed and we talked maybe once a week and caught up maybe one a week, now when we are together sparks are flying, we still act the same. it feels like we are together when we are together if that makes sense.
Now i have come to a point where i dont know if i can continue to keep seeing her because my love for her breaks my heart knowing she will not give us another chance.
this is where it gets a bit messy in my mind and why i dont know why i cant come to terms with her not wanting to be with me.
I told her recently i couldnt do the friend thing anymore because i loved her, she got upset and said it feels like your leaving me all over again. but then she says to me she wants me to move on and be happy??
She tells me that she stills feels comfortable with me and feels like she can open up to me and no one else, she wants to chill with me, she wants to spend nights in cuddling and even mentioned staying over at my house. i told her that after seeing her on social media with other guys that i actually felt a bit of hate towards her and she goes thats good thats how i was feeling when you left me but then we have sex the same night.. and it was amazing.
am i just here to comfort her until something better comes along? am i being used?? or is she still that hurt from the breakup and this is my chance to show her how good we are together again and re gain her trust by spending more time with her personally and being affectionate and close?
it seems like she is enjoying her independance with her girlfriends but wants to see me 1-3 times a week and have that relationship aspect also? how should i be reading into this?
if i have missed any details please feel free to ask otherwise look forward to all the advice given
thank you.