How do I let her down easy?

[archi]

First of all, our relationship is online and voice only.
(I'll use a list to explain my situation, HIGHLIGHTED stuff is "imp)

She is 18, I am 20
Met her online
My intention was to only be friends and talk
Her mentality is that of a teenager still, so she attached fairly quickly
She engaged in dirty talk and later realized that she enjoys talking to people like that
She told me her problems and I listened, we've been talking for a while now and almost everyday, which I have eased slowly
Insecure about herself and the fact that I tell her that nothing is wrong with her and I like her for her personality, it brings me closer..
I've never mentioned that I want a relationship with her and that only I like her, as in talking to her, which I have stated many times
She understands that we aren't boyfriend/girlfriend, but she told me that she is still friends with her "ex" as if I should know that
She makes it clear that I mean something to her, even mentioned it in the first days we began talking
Apparently, I am the first person to talk to her with a voice call that she met online...
I've tried a few times on giving her the notion that we are just friends but she doesn't like it when I say that...

I've had breakups and they've been mutual and a breakup with someone like her is hard for me and almost feels like doing so would make her depressed or something.
She UNDERSTANDS that we aren't together but sometimes talks as if we should meet and know each other closer.
I just want to be friends with her and not have something over my back that reminds me that she sees is it more than friends but less than boyfriend/girlfriend...
When we talk over the phone, it feels that she "needs" my voice to feel at ease or something. I don't want that type of thing.

Would it work if I simply stopped talking to her so much, closed myself and separated from her so she could realize that I am not the guy she should like?

[Photog]

There's little to let down. Sounds like she just has quite a lot of growing to do. She wants more than friendship, but not a bf/gf relationship.

Explain to her how you see this, what you're comfortable with and what you're not. Then ask if that works for her. If not, wish her the very best and explain that she needs to seek what she's looking for elsewhere. If you're not comfortable with 'dirty talk', tell her that it needs to not be a part of conversation. Stand firm with her.

In doing so, you're creating a boundary that you have a right to. You'll respect yourself for doing so, and she'll learn that people are entitled to them, and to respect those boundaries, or she'll disrespect the person.

Be her friend. Be what you're comfortable with. If that doesn't work for her, then she will find it elsewhere, and she'll survive any perceived loss.

I admire that you're compassionate to her needs and feelings. Sounds to me like she has a great friend in you. I hope she can see the value in that alone.

But your comfort zones come first.

Best wishes...

[rjitktd]

very good interesting temm for me and manis athes piples around me and freands of my wife. ilowe it soo match /like athes. good aspects

[breathe123]

If she as you yourself said above ~ " She understands that we aren't boyfriend/girlfriend " then state it again to her clearer so she not only knows it she really KNOWS it from you for the final time.

If you don't want a relationship with her, cut off the daily chats & don't do any sex chats & look for a real girl in your city to go out with, your life & what you want matters too.

[woody]

O.P
Her mentality sounds younger than an 18 year old and possibly obsessive. Could be a sketchy situation so the longer you continue it, the messier it can be.

Consider it like ripping off a bandage. Hurts more the slower you go at it.

[TiffanyLum]

You are a good person for asking such a question. Many guys just let their girls down harshly. Congratulations for not being one of them [considering the fact that she's not even your girlfriend]

Just tell her she's an amazing girl and say many wonderful things about her, but tell her that you are just not interested, although you treasure your friendship with her

Then disappear.