HELP"! Should I let it go?

[BalticGirl]

» Wed May 20, 2015 10:58 am

Hi All
I think I need guys advice..
So I met this guy three weeks ago. We had a very nice first date and ended up going home together.
Next morning when he was driving me home, we stopped to have some lunch and ice cream by the river.
He texted after saying that he has really enjoyed time with me and looking forward to meet me again.
So we did. Met second time and 3rd time last Friday.
He took me out for nice dinner and drinks.
I thought it was OK to text him first now. So I did. I asked how was his weekend with parents.
We were texting a bit this yesterday morning.
Since he has initiated previous dates, this time I asked him if he is still keen to do something next weekend. The answer was “Sure, but maybe towards the end as I have plans for Sat and Sun”
I asked if Friday would work? He said “Or Monday?” (long weekend) I told him, that Friday would work better for me and asked him to let me know,so I can arrange the rest of the weekend too.
Haven’t heard anything yet from him...and this was on Monday...
Should I just be softly direct and ask him if he is keen at all? leave it(HARDEST PART)?
I think I am suffering from anxiety.. Which brings me to very insecure feeling.
I am usually a person, who wants direct answers. I can take this " hard pill" be sad for the while, but at least I know where I am standing for sure.. And feel like texting him and asking if he is keen at all.. But this again would sound very desperate and needy. I dont wanna ruin things if there is still something..
After my dramatic break up 4 month ago, I finally felt that I met someone I like..

Thank you!

Sab

[Wakeup]

He told you that he was available Monday and you said Friday would be better for you and then he went radio silent?

I'd say he is also dating others and won't be able to see you Friday so rather then lie or make a lame excuse, he's just going to let you stew in your own juices until Monday and then he'll likely text you to see if you're free.

Did you have sex with him when you "went home together" after just meeting him for the first time?

[BalticGirl]

Hi, yes we did have sex. I know people are jugdmental for that.. Well maybe its not ideal, but i have had experience where having sex on the firrst date has led me to long term relationships.
Besidea that i saw him few more times two, went for dinner, drinks..
I am just very impatient... Waiting is killing me more than anything... Would texting him something like " i see you dont seem very keen" would be a hudge mistake?

[Wakeup]

Nothing wrong with having sex on the first meet if that's how you're feeling about someone (no judgement there) but there certainly is something wrong with having sex on the first meet and expecting it to lead to a relationship... or even another date for that matter.

You do what your gut tells you to do but for goodness sakes, forget the passive aggressive bullshit and just ask him if he's free for Friday night or make another time available to him if Monday isn't any good for you. Most of all: Don't have expectations because you had sex... This guy probably is seeing other girl(s) (hence why he's busy on a prime dating weekend).

BTW: Having a do-over doesn't mean a thing to a player (if that's what he is). They court until they're sure you'll be all in a tither like you are right now and then they just bounce back in when it suits them. Watch he doesn't do the fade on you only to come back like he owns you.

Where did you have sex that first time... His place or yours?

[BalticGirl]

Hi wakeup!

Firstly, thank you for the advices here- appreciated!

Well yes i dont usually have any expectations after the fist date anyways. But we had more dates after having sex.

We had sex at his place and a very nice day after. He was driving me home, so
We stopped to have lunch, walk and ice cream.

We were texting almost daily too. Like once a day.

My problem here is that i ruined my relationship with a guy i really like for being very pushy. And trying to avoid it now.

He already knows i wanna see him. And i said that friday is better for me. I dont know if the same question would really help?

[Wakeup]

Well, Have you heard from him yet about a Friday date? If you haven't then I'd be telling him you've made other plans if he contacts you last minute. I'd be telling him that you didn't think he was available since he didn't bother to respond.

I doubt you'll do that though and like I said, when/if he does contact you next week or so, you'll just allow him back into your life for more sex with unvoiced expectations. *shrugs*

So... did he confirm Friday with you?

[BalticGirl]

No he has not. And thats the end for me now. Today was a deadline to which I would ever respond.
If it happens that he will ever contact me- i wont be responding at all I think...
I believe this is is very much disrespectful to leave me hanging like that...
We are friends on fb, do u think i should deletw him as well?