Married but I can't understand my female co-worker?

[gonemad]

I'm married and I was having problems with my wife and currently we live in different cities but somehow we have stable life and I visit her 2-3 times per month.

I knew an ex-coworker since 2008 and in the same city I work (I work now in a different company) and we had been very close friends and I really liked her. We used to talk on phone for hours or meet. From 2 years I told her I love her as I felt too that she has true feelings for me. She got married on papers only last year and after few months she got many problems with her future husband. We used to hang out occasionally. Since then she asked for a divorce (and that stayed for almost a year). We used to flirt a lot, I kissed her hands, she used to touch me romantically and we both in a situation than we love each other and we didn't have sex as she still virgin.
Our culture is banning sex before marriage. Early this year (2014) she was promoted in her job and had many responsibilities and she was very busy although she always text me and sometimes we hangout but due to her married situation she changed a lot and confessed to me that she became more tough and asked me not to feel bad about that. From 2 weeks she was having an annual vacation for 2 weeks and she asked me to meet but we couldn't make it.From a couple of days when I was texting her asking about how she is doing in life , she told me that she took a decision to return back to her husband (she is 31 years old) as he changed a lot (he is abusive by the way and they used to quarrel a lot of his bad as well as his family behavior). She always have the style of on/off relationship i.e. disappear and reappear.

During all the previous period (9 months) we were having a small chat on Whatsapp or Facebook. Just short messages like wassup etc....
But she always keep saying I miss you. And she always tell me that her husband is with her so we can't meet. Two months ago, she told me she'll meet me after she finish her work and she apologized just before the date saying that her husband will come to pick up her.

From From about 2 weeks ago we had 3 phone calls in a week where we talked about our jobs and some family problems. She told me she is not married yet and she is not sad but she don't know why her "husband" didn't take the final step to marry her yet??

Then last week we met, I picked up her with my new car and this is the first time for her to sit beside me (by the way in our culture it's not that easy for a girl or woman to ride a car with a man)

We had a little chat and I gave her a present that I bought on her birthday but since then we didn't meet to give it to her.
She liked it so much and she told me you always exceed my expectations and you are amazing.

I asked her I don't want to lose you and she told me why are you saying this? relationship can end but friendship never.
Honestly I was very happy to hear that. Finally I drove her back to work and we told each other I'll miss you.

Any comments please? and what does this mean?

[Wakeup]

It means you are wasting your life and heart on a woman that is never going to be yours. You are an adulterer and I'm sure that in your culture you could get her stoned or worse so quit being so fling selfish and stop your nonsense with her.

You cheat two women with your selfish behaviour.

[gonemad]

I know I'm all wrong.
I have decided many times to go away and was able to disappear for months but we open a conversation again.
What I really don't understand is her behavior. For me, I want to stay just friends as I asked her that last time and no more so what do you think she want from me at this stage from female perspective?

[Khocie]

I think this is the reason why I always think it is a bad idea to be friends with an ex especially if you are with someone else. I also think you should decided to divorce your wife to be this other man's wife or stop what you are doing and fix your marriage. You are using this other woman to run away from your fading marriage so man up and fix your house as a man

[Wakeup]

It means you are wasting your life and heart on a woman that is never going to be yours. You are an adulterer and I'm sure that in your culture you could get her stoned or worse so quit being so fling selfish and stop your nonsense with her.

You cheat two women with your selfish behaviour.

Stop worrying about what her motives are (probably just likes your undivided devotion and plays you) but rather concentrate on yourself and put the focus back on you and your wife. Be kind to her, flirt with her, take her out and do fun things with her. In short, do everything with her that you would like to do with your friend. Make your wife you best friend and leave this woman to herself.

Don't talk to her anymore. End it and get on with the woman you chose as a wife (or were arranged to be with). No.More.Female.Friend. In time you will get over her if you put your mind to doing just that.

[megvoh]

Start of an emotional affair?
Don't cheat, you'll have to work on marriage or leave it and then go for other woman when free.