Do i love her?

[anonadamanon]

Hey everyone, I'm new to this site and this is my first post so sorry if i seem like i dont know what im doing, haha, I tried to post this earlier but i wasnt logged in, i hope it works this time :')

So in December i met a girl and we've been chatting on facebook and meeting up every since, im 16 btw. We go to different schools but her school is the school i'm going to once i finish secondary school. Anyway so I had a crush on her and she liked me too, and in March we decided to start "going" out, ya know we started a proper relationship.

So everything was great, I really really liked her, I felt I loved her. We get along extremely well, and we like lots of the same stuff. I've always had mild anxiety, and I have one of those friends who is is exactly like me, only better, so I was anxious about her meeting him. Anyway she eventually did, and things were fine, except I had a nagging feeling that she might start liking him.

She didn't, and I eventually decided to talk to her about it, and we clarified that I was the person she loved, we loved each other. This was in late April, early May. But the nagging feeling continued, I kept worrying and worrying. Then one day I thought to myself, wait, what if it's me that doesnt love her?

That's where everything started feeling wrong. I couldnt get it out of my head. Over facebook i have an awful tight feeling, despite chatting like normal and laughing together. And it's the same to this day. When we meet up, the feeling goes away almost completely and i'm content, unless i start thinking about how i've felt, and also when she's leaving my house, or i'm leaving hers.

There's something else that might affect it though: stress. Because of exams. These feelings started right before exam time. The stress would only magnify my anxiety, and my anxiety would only magnify my stress. Plus, the stress killed my sex drive, but That's my theory. But I'm worrying I'm wrong. I don't want to break up with her. I'm certain I'll feel the love again, not just bursts when we're together, all the time, after exams are over and stress dies down. But I'm so scared that it won't. I want her to be happy, I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I feel like I'm leading her on or something. I feel like my love is being suppressed, not that it's there. I've had bad experiences in the past, and I feel like that's influencing me a bit, I don't want to get hurt again. I believe that I'll get over this, and then I'll love her more than ever.

But i'm desperate for other's opinions. If you respond to this, with anything (except spam) thank you so much, I'd really, really, really, really appreciate it. Thanks again.

[pcmaster]

You are quite young and already in a loving relationship with a girl. yes you love her. because you care about her and want her to be happy, dont wanna hurt her. thats the sign of love. But you see how it is. Young guys who dont have much expierience and wants best to the girl they love and dont wannnna hurt - exactly thats why they hurt girls. In your case I would stop worry about it and just enjoy every moment. Don't step back thinking that it would be better for her. She will decide whats best for her. Best you can do is enjoy time with her and dont think too much. At this age its more about doing than thinking.

[Khocie]

I agree with pcmaster you are at the stage of doing not thinking too much, However your doings should be obviously followed by responsibilities. You are in the late adolescents where many developments are unfolding, cognition development, physical development which influences your emotions and the way you handle stressful situations. I can agree with you that even exams have something to do with it. At this moment try not to think too much about your relationship, go with the flow and them when exams are done you can make plans of going out. Use the time with her as the moment of relaxation, talking about things you two love and laughing together, during exams you need to feel more relaxed with your girlfriend more than any other times. Think positive only.

[anonadamanon]

thanks for the reply i really appreciate it, although it's hard to stop worrying, even though i try im just scared that im not gonna feel the same again, and i'd hate that as i was really happy until i started doubting things. thanks again

- - - Updated - - -

thank you for replying it's really nice to get other's opinions, a lot of what you've said makes sense, but it's really hard to stay positive even though i really try, i'm just really scared that the feelings aren't gonna come back in full swing haha :/ do you think they will eventually, once stress dies down? i think my main problem is overthinking, stress has worsened it along with anxiety and i've got all muddled up, it sucks haha :') thanks again for the reply