We still have a connection 3 years later.... what should I do?

[Miss_Stellar]

When he and I were both young, we had chemistry and I moved too quickly and he backed off. We are almost finished with college now and we are still really close. We still have mad chemistry together. Although we go to schools in different state, he asks to see me every time he is in town. Is it possible he could be more attracted to me now that we are more mature? I m afraid that it will make him back off again. What should I do?

[starbar]

you should stop wasting your youth pining for a guy who doesn't want you romantically. If he did, you would be together already. Stop talking to him and you will get over him. Find a man who can offer you something other than just chemistry

[TheEvilJester]

Well, how young was "young?" In other words, how old were you when you tried to have a more serious relationship and he was not interested? How many years have passed? Is he still single?

Frankly, I lean towards agreeing with starbar. If he wasn't interested in you as more then friends back then, it is unlikely that would have changed. It's not impossible, but it is unlikely. He knows you are interested, or at least knows you were. If he was interested, he'd have most likely made his move.

If you feel like you must, you could give it one last shot. Who knows? Maybe he is interested but just felt too awkward after he previously rejected you and figured you wouldn't want to give him a chance. Or, maybe his mind has changed. Still, most likely nothing has changed. If you do decide to go for it, you need to be prepared for the possibility that he is not interested again.

Now, if you could see just being friends with him and not allow that to hinder you from seeking out relationships with other guys who would actually want to be with you, I'd say go ahead and remain his friend. Considering you still feel a bit hung up on him after 3 years, I find it doubtful that this would be a good idea for you. I don't think it would be fair to yourself to do that, because you can't get over him if you don't move on, and if you don't get over him you are not likely to open yourself up to other possible relationships.

Don't waste your time waiting around for something that may never happen. You tried and he wasn't interested. That is okay. He doesn't have to want the same thing you do, but you also don't deserve to be stuck on a guy who doesn't want to be more than friends. You deserve a guy who will be falling all over himself to be with you. Go out and find yourself that guy. Good luck to you.