Confused: does he like me?

[tawnyaprl]

I have a best guy friend and I've been friends with him for nearly 5 years now. He has been dating several women until last year. Tried proposing to three gals, two didn't work out and one worked out but ended/broke up last year. And I was/am always his go to person for any problems he would like to share. So whenever he had a crush on any gal, he always used to stop by my place share everything about her and get my thoughts or feedback etc.

However, things started to change in the past one year, he has still been seeing other gals but not seriously like before(like before, he was giving flowers, gifts etc but nothing as such for the past one year). Frankly he never was able to find a gal who he seriously got involved with in the past one year. While he was dating other gals, he started becoming close to me. Like we've gotten so close to each other that we joke around about anything and everything. Watch movies sitting on couch right next to each other, he lays his arms around my neck sometimes , fights with me playfully, tickle me etc. and always used to hang out at my place over the weekend for hours together. He started touching me a lot, which I thought was out of friendliness. And whenever am tired, he used to give me neck massage. Since he never expressed any interest in me for the past 5 years I never really took his behavior seriously, just thought he was being friendly with me. But I should admit that I've always liked him since the day I met but never really expressed my feelings towards him. So one weekend, we ended up watching a movie and after a while he started touching me and became so close to me that he started groping me and I was half naked. He caught me off guard and I couldn't understand what was going on just took me by surprise. Finally I stopped him saying it's hurting. So he apologized for that and left for the day. The next day he stopped by and apologized again and said I don't want to lose our friendship, at the end of the day we both are opposite sexes and what happened today shouldn't be understood as something else.

Frankly I don't understand what his statement exactly meant. Does he like me at all or was it just lust that made him act like that? Can a guy just make a physical move if he doesn't have any kind of attraction/liking towards a gal? And what confused me was he never kissed me, but directly started this groping act which raises all sorts of questions. I can't stop thinking about this and need some advice from someone.

[basilandthyme]

>>Can a guy just make a physical move if he doesn't have any kind of attraction/liking towards a gal?<<

If he'd had a few drinks, then very much so. You can gauge a man's attraction level by the amount of drinks he needs before he finds the girl attractive. Of course, if he was stone cold sober the he most likely does find you attractive. Mind you, lack of kissing does not bode well.

There is a really good rule of thumb when trying to figure out what someone means when they tell you something: You ASK them what they mean. There is no shame in replying "what are you trying to say?" Even at this point, it's OK to say "what you said the other day - I didn't understand what you were getting at". Unless he had been drinking when he got physical - in which case it's safe to assume it was just a drunken fumble and nothing more.

One final thing: Stay away from having a romantic entanglement with a guy who's proposed to three different girls in 5 years and had success with none. It means that he's probably rather desperate - and that he's also unable to read how good/bad a relationship is.

[tawnyaprl]

He wasn't drunk or anything he was completely in his senses when he did this. I don't mind asking him, but if he doesn't have any feelings for me, I would be ruining our friendship. That's all am worried about.

[basilandthyme]

He wasn't drunk or anything he was completely in his senses when he did this. I don't mind asking him, but if he doesn't have any feelings for me, I would be ruining our friendship. That's all am worried about.

You've already crossed the line of just friendship. It can't do more damage to find out what he meant.