Hey everyone,
I don't usually do this kind of thing but there is really something bugging me about my relationship with my girlfriend. We met at Uni and have been dating for 5 months, however we were good friends before we made the decision to go out.
She is so lovely and absolutely adores me and we get on really well. I genuinely think I love her because I feel a definite connection between us but there is an issue. The problem lies with myself, as sometimes she just annoys me. Some days I wake up irritated with her for no reason and whenever she shows affection towards me I reject her. Sometimes I even go out of my way to get on her nerves, it's awful. Then you have other days where I'll get on with her fine as if nothing was up.
We went on holiday recently and everything went really well, I was genuinely gutted when it was over. But still, a few weeks on, she'll say something and I'll become all funny and in a mood. For example, whenever she expresses her love to me it angers me for no reason. We've been away from each other all summer due to the fact I live abroad and she got really upset when we went our separate ways but I didn't. This is so frustrating because I really don't know why it happens and I don't know who to ask. If I talk to her about it she'll feel distraught.
Starting from September we're living in the same accommodation again. She's only just got the fact that we need space, if it were up to her we'd be with eachother every living second (maybe that's what love is), but I hate the idea of spending all that time with her. So next year I'll purposely do my own things to create space. But is this a good thing?
The only possible explanation I have thought of was my bad break up with my ex girlfriend. We both thought we were going to marry each other and live the rest of our lives together but we broke up and it effected me real badly. I told myself from that day onwards that I was young and naive and that getting involved with a girl was a NO GO for at least a year or so. However along popped my girlfriend and I'm now doubting whether I love her or not because quite frankly I have no idea what that is anymore.
Sorry if this seems a tad dramatic, I understand that there are people out there in far worse situations than myself! But I just wanted to get it off of my chest and see if anyone had some constructive advice
Thank you so much,