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Thread: American Men - What's he up to? I don't get it (Central European)

  1. #1
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    American Men - What's he up to? I don't get it (Central European)

    Hi!

    I just moved to the US for work. As I did not know anyone, a guy from our office took me out with his friends to a preseason football game and tailgate. Later, he went to US open with me (although I think he didn't like it - he does not admit, though). He buys me drinks. At work he sometimes texts, me (we don't necessarily see each other there). Sometimes he also texts me in the evening, asking how my day was. He mentioned several times that he likes to be around me, that I was "a really fun girl", "extremely smart", even "hot" came up once we went on an afterwork beer with colleagues.

    For me, this feels like he is interested. But I am not sure and as he is a colleague I don't want to make things uncomfortable. The reason why I am not sure is: A European guy, after 3 weeks, would have made VERY clear what he wants. He would have asked you out on a romantic date and very likely tried to kiss me.

    So how does that work in the US? Do you think he is just being nice? Who takes initiative? And where do you kiss, BTW - I never see people kissing each other in this country!

    Thank you,
    cultureclash

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    Welcome to America...land of the repressed...where someone is ALWAYS offended by something everywhere you go. It certainly sounds like this guy is interested in you. Picking up chicks in the workplace is risky because people are so litigious here, and yes it can make things uncomfortable if you get involved with him and things go bad. Have you flirted back at him at all?

    I kiss pretty much wherever the urge strikes me, but sometimes my guy friends complain when I plant one on them. lol
    Pain is what the world does to you, suffering is what you do to yourself. Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.

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    Quote Originally Posted by solarion View Post
    Welcome to America...land of the repressed...where someone is ALWAYS offended by something everywhere you go. It certainly sounds like this guy is interested in you. Picking up chicks in the workplace is risky because people are so litigious here, and yes it can make things uncomfortable if you get involved with him and things go bad. Have you flirted back at him at all?

    I kiss pretty much wherever the urge strikes me, but sometimes my guy friends complain when I plant one on them. lol

    I guess yes, I flirted back a little. Was careful per the workplace situation. We might meet tomorrow. I'll see how things will go. Thank you!

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    He does sound interested and there are many reasons why he hasn't directly asked you out. Maybe he doesn't want to break the policy of dating someone from work? Maybe he wants to keep things casual? Men do this because he hasn't figured out if he really really like a girl to pursue her in full force but still want to keep the option open.
    A strong woman takes advantage of help she can get from people around her but she doesn't rely on them for anything

    She uses logic and manages her emotions

    She offers help either because it is a business transaction or out of kindness. It is never because she hopes others will return the favour or out of fear of losing them

    She has her own mind and thinks for herself and knows that she has to be the one who bears the consequences of her decisions

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    He called you hot and texts you at night and you are asking if he is interested, lol duh clearly he wants some of you! Maybe because you work together he is keeping back his full creeper style and playing it safer and cooler.

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    Quote Originally Posted by megvoh View Post
    He called you hot and texts you at night and you are asking if he is interested, lol duh clearly he wants some of you! Maybe because you work together he is keeping back his full creeper style and playing it safer and cooler.
    Haha, got a point there. But still don't know if he's just looking for some fun, just enjoys flirting or what this is...

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    It makes it more difficult because you work together if you didn't it would be easier to feel it out with him, in all ways

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