Is she not interested?

[dannmann1992]

I used to date this this girl back in hs and I ran into her 8 years later. I reached out and we started talking. I do most of the reaching out, I think she's only said something first once or twice and she usually just doesn't respond back after a while. In Jan. I asked if I could make dinner for her for vday, she said yes, I asked what she liked to eat but didn't get a response. She's been studying for an important test so she's been really busy. So I asked again a few weeks ago she said yes. So we finally had vday. I made dinner put rose petals on the bed, all that good stuff. We had sex for the first time and she kept getting dry, even after a few more tries. Was she not interested/attracted enough? Anyways I was kissing her forehead, playing in her hair, cuddling, talking etc. Eventually I dropped her off on Monday but we haven't talked since. Neither one of us has said anything to each other. Is she not interested? Was she not into the sex either?*

[CuriousJane]

Based on what you said and what you observed with her actions... I think Yes, she is not just into you... But if you want to make sure, you can ask her, speak to her about your feelings, only then you will find out what her true answer is.

[amj1979]

My totally honest feeling is she was just really excited to reconnect after so many years. You dated before so that connection, however small, will always be there. Because you went all out for her she was probably very flattered and thus totally open to hooking up. When things got hot and heavy she may have realized it "wasn't there" for her, but she didn't want to just push you off her. After 8 years it's possible to become friends, but the idea of rekindling a relationship is a tough one. I'm sorry that happened to you, but don't let it bring you down. Too many new women out there for you to be hung up on an old one!

[dannmann1992]

My totally honest feeling is she was just really excited to reconnect after so many years. You dated before so that connection, however small, will always be there. Because you went all out for her she was probably very flattered and thus totally open to hooking up. When things got hot and heavy she may have realized it "wasn't there" for her, but she didn't want to just push you off her. After 8 years it's possible to become friends, but the idea of rekindling a relationship is a tough one. I'm sorry that happened to you, but don't let it bring you down. Too many new women out there for you to be hung up on an old one!

Thanks for the response! So what you mean by" it wasn't there for her" you mean when she kept getting dry?

[amj1979]

I meant that she wasn't emotionally connected to the idea of sleeping with you. Women tend to need that more than men (unless it's a total hookup), and if it's not there they can have a tougher time surrendering to the moment, so to speak.

[Gladimeir15]

I used to date this this girl back in hs and I ran into her 8 years later. I reached out and we started talking. I do most of the reaching out, I think she's only said something first once or twice and she usually just doesn't respond back after a while. In Jan. I asked if I could make dinner for her for vday, she said yes, I asked what she liked to eat but didn't get a response. She's been studying for an important test so she's been really busy. So I asked again a few weeks ago she said yes. So we finally had vday. I made dinner put rose petals on the bed, all that good stuff. We had sex for the first time and she kept getting dry, even after a few more tries. Was she not interested/attracted enough? Anyways I was kissing her forehead, playing in her hair, cuddling, talking etc. Eventually I dropped her off on Monday but we haven't talked since. Neither one of us has said anything to each other. Is she not interested? Was she not into the sex either?*

As what i understood, this girl likes you too. She would not be out dating with you on vday if she doesn't like you. But like is totally different from falling for you. Better talk to her, tell her want you really want from her so you'll know what she's feeling for you, what the stand between the two of you. Tell her what you really feel towards her. Whatever it may be, you have to accept it, in such a way you could also move on and find another girl if she's not into you. Better be clear than expecting things.