I don't know what to do?

[Fitness2198]

Well there's this girl I been talking to for about a month now. She's bestfriends with my best friend. And the moment I saw her I felt so mesmerised. I never saw a girl as beautiful as her. The first time we met was when I picked her up and my best friend from college. I invited them to a party on a friday and we all went. She told my friend Jack and I that she does not want to hook up with any guy at the party so if anyone tries to do something to protect her and we agreed. Because she recently got out of a 2 and a half year relationship and she's really heartbroken. She's extremely lightweight so she got drunk easily. There were about 4 guys trying to hook up with her and she noticed that so she quickly came up to me and told me to dance with her. We danced all night and it was really romantic. I kissed her on the cheek a few times but then she had to head home because her parents wanted her to go asap. She was drunk out of her mind. She kept bumping into cars and i had to keep taking care of her. We tapped kissed by an accident and we kept hugging each other. We sat down at this park. And we started talking about our lives. She told me a little bit about her ex and how hurt she is that he left her. And i talked about mine too. After a while i told her the truth how I wanted to kiss her on the lips at the party but I didn't bc i didn't want her to think i'm taking advantage of her. And she told me good thing you didn't. And I'm like why? And she's like cause it proves that you're different from other guys. cause if someone kissed me I WOULD LET THEM BC I ACT STUPID WHEN IM DRUNK. So i felt flattered and i started complimenting her. How pretty she is and stuff. Then she told me, you too especially with that cute smile of yours. If I wasn't in love with my ex I would have totally fell for you. We held hands on our way home and the next day i told her the truth about everything cause she couldn't remember and she felt so bad. She's like omg im soo sorry im too nice when im drunk. You must think so bad about me. But thank you for taking me home I really appreciate it. And Im like haha dw about it, its fine. We text for a few days and I eventually ask her hey do you want hang out? Just you and I though. Not a date though. I want to get to know you better. You're a super cool girl and she's like sure! When. Fast forward a few days and I start feeling regret cause i actually wanted to ask her on a date. I didn't want it to be a friendly thing. So i confronted her about it. And she got mad. She's like so is it a date or not ? Please clarify. And Im like yeahh and she's like okay then Im down for a date. You're a super cool guy too. Just dont fall for me and I won't fall for you. Cause my heart is still hurting. And I agreed. Thursday came the day of the date. And it was honestly the best date I ever had. We have soo much in common like even the smallest things. We are from the same nationality, the same home town too. We have the same interest in music we love to dance play video games etc. I was like wow this girl is amazing.

We kept texting back to back for days and I started to fall for her. I invited her and my friend jack to a party again on a friday and they agreed to come. The day came and she was around my neighborhood so she came over to my house. I was showing her my photos when i was younger, we made food. Etc. We had a really fun time. We laughed a lot etc. Then we headed out to pick up my friend Jack at his house to go the party. On the way i told her something was bothering me and she told me whats up? And I told her the truth. I told her, i know that youre thinking I want something serious. I dont. I just dont know. I guess im falling for you. And shes like I told you not to! And Im like well it's not my fault youre irrestible. And she laughed and she complimented me saying youre a really sweet guy. You look really cute too like a doll. But we need to be friends. I dont want to hurt you. I care about you. And im like no I dont mind waiting for you you're worth it in my eyes. And she kept telling me not to because shes still caught about her ex and even if she gets over him she doesn't want anything serious with anyone. She just wants to mess around. And we arrived to my friends house so shes like lets just talk about this later after the party.

But at the party IT WAS NOT FRIENDLY. She wanted to be around me. In the beginning she would look for me cause i would disappear sometimes since I needed to help cause I was one of the hosts of the party. When they put bachata on her and I were starting to dance. But then my friend came up to me and told me to go outside cause its my turn to be outside the door and she seemed to upset she held my hand like she didn't want me to go. Regardless I ignored my friend. And we kept dancing our bodies were so close to each other. It was almost time for her to leave so i told my friend Jack to take her friend crystal away for a while cause kept blocking us. So i pull her away and tell her. Hey can we talk and shes likes sure. We go to the back part of the party and I ask her are you drunk? And shes like no (It was true cause she only took one shot the whole night ). And im like okay cause I wouldn't want you to think Im taking advantage of you. And she stares at me in confusion. What are you talking about? And I just went in for the kiss. And she kissed me back. We kissed for like a whole minute then she stopped out of knowhere and she hugged me tight for such a long time Idk why. We then held hands and we started walking towards her friend but once we got to her friend she let go of my hand.

We then went outside waiting for her friend and her to get picked up. And her friend kept blocking us. But there was this moment her friend left. So i approached her and tried to kiss her again and she moved away this time. And I felt bad. I was like im sorry for trying to kiss you. And shes like hey dont worry, its okay. Then she hugged me. She jumped on top of me and started hugging me from the back. And I told her as cheesy as it sounds you're my dream girl. Ive never met someone like you. And she was staring at me as if I was the sweetest thing ever. I told her I wish we met earlier and she told me I wish we did too. She had to leave and she said bye to everyone except me. Until my friend screamed out my name for whatever reason and she remembered that she forgot to say bye to me. So she comes up to me and hugs me and says bye Ill see you tmm (since she needs to pick up her bag cause she left it at my house). My friend Elizabeth was really drunk so when she started leaving she screamed out you better text him! And she turns around smiles and says I will.

We talked during the night and she kept telling me to forget about her. Cause she really doesn't want to hurt me. I agreed. The next day my friend Jack shows me the text messages with her and she said really nice things about me she was he kissed me and my friend was like oooo did you kisd him back? And shes like hes great. Yes I did. And hes like awww and dont get me wrong i find him soo cute and his personality too. shes like hes such an awesome guy. But I just can't. I realized i still love my ex ohdde. And i dont want to hurt him. But he doesn't want to listen to me. And my friend is like what if you get over your ex? What there be a chance for you to be together? And shes like no bc I want to be alone after i get over my ex. I dont want anything serious. I just want to mess around. idk maybe later on in life.

We agreed to be friends but it hasnt been the same. She told me she wants to keep talking to me and that she doesn't want to lose our friendship. She told me to hit her up whenever im ready to have a normal convo. And I said okay. Its been a week and I miss talking to her. I literally think about her everyday but Idk i feel so bad. I should have taken things slow. I feel like I messed up my chances with her. We had a deep connection and I really valued it. Idk if I lost it. Bc it hasn't been the same :/

Any advice on what to do would help thanks!

[lovebroken]

Her telling you, " if I wasn't so in love with my ex " is a red flag. Not even close to being over ex because she still LOVES him.
Second reg flag, friend zoning you with " don't fall for me and I won't fall for you". Then you immediately go and fall for her?
Third, " But we need to be friends".

Was she wasted at this party too? Or more sober but not sober altogether?

You are pushing too hard, back off be more subtle and not so aggressive about wanting her, take hint she pulled away from your kiss. Too much push and pulling happening. Again she mentions loving hr ex. If she wants to be with you, she will make it happen she needs to get over her ex.