Does This Guy Like Me or Not?

[nataly66687]

Alright this guy and I have been talking for 2 weeks this week. Him and I started first talking on September 22nd up until now, on the first day we talked from 3PM til midnight. The following days it was 1 hour here, another couple of hours here, etc. Then as the week went on, leading into the weekend, he didn't talk to me for a few days. It is now the second week, and during our week of talking last week, I got him to talk to me on the phone, and he had said I could call him whenever, so I called him a few times but he never answered. And with him not talking to me for a few days either, I assumed he wasn't interested in me. I was ready to delete his number and everything altogether. Then I decided to call him one more time to see if he would pick up. And he did and we talked on the phone for 7 minutes. Then he said he would call me back, and he never did. I then texted him and asked him "Are we still meeting up this weekend for our first date?" and he never replied to my text message. So I am so confused, I know I can text him and ask him "Are you interested or not?" but he probably won't reply or he will just say "Yes" and then keep this game play of texting me not much or I have to do all the chasing or calling while he doesn't do much of anything. I just don't know, I am so confused by this, what to do?

[TheEvilJester]

Unfortunately, I think based on the evidence you have, all of us would have to conclude pretty much the same as you..... He might like you, or he might not. I will say this, though.... if he liked you enough, he'd make an effort to keep in touch with you. You wouldn't feel like you have to always be the one to initiate things, and even then to feel like you practically have to chase him down.

All that said.... that doesn't necessarily mean he has no interest. Maybe he's dating other women too. I mean, that would not be wrong to do. You two haven't even had a first date yet. I would hope (but could be wrong) that he'd be more attentive if you two became more serious. Bottom line, though, whether or not his intentions are pure, if you don't feel he gives you enough attention then you would not be wrong to just forget about him and move on.

Maybe he's not intending to make you feel ignored. Maybe he sincerely wants to date you, but has just been otherwise occupied. If you are fine with just taking things more casually and see where they go, then you could feel free to continue talking to him. I just wouldn't suggest you put all your eggs in one basket, so to speak. In other words, if he doesn't give you much attention, then you might as well also still be looking for other guys as well unless you two did begin to become more serious. But, on the other hand, if you are not fine with how little he seems to be available, then you'd not be wrong to just move on. Hell, there needn't even be any hard feelings. Maybe you want somebody who is more readily available, and maybe he just can't offer that right now. No harm, no foul, but if he doesn't show enough interest and that isn't good enough for you, then you shouldn't let yourself be strung along.

If you do decide that, and he then finally actually motivates himself to make plans with you, you can decide then if you want to bother to give him that chance. Let HIM be the one to make the next move now since you've tried and he doesn't seem to be motivated to follow-up. On the other hand, I couldn't necessarily blame you if it would be too little too late even if he did finally make the next move.

Good luck to you either way.

[nataly66687]

Yeah thanks, since I texted him this past weekend asking him if we were going to meet this weekend for our first date, he never replied to that message or called me and it is now Wednesday. So I don't think he is interested, and I don't think we are going to meet up after all which sucks.

[TheEvilJester]

Eh, you know what? That's his loss. This weekend still hasn't happened, so who knows? Maybe he'll reach out to you before. But, if I were you I would not reach out to him again unless he does first. If he doesn't get back to you at all this weekend (or even if he finally does at some point this weekend but just with a "sorry, I can't this time" kind of thing) I would just forget him and move on.

Again, it's like I said, maybe he's not intending to string you along, but that doesn't change the fact that it IS exactly what he's doing whether intentionally or not. So, perhaps time just to look for other guys. Maybe he'll finally get his act together soon, and if so maybe it will be too late in your eyes, maybe it won't.... but I just wouldn't wait around for him if I were you.

Good luck.

[nataly66687]

He's hasn't spoken to me since I asked him about us meeting up this past Sunday and its now Thursday so don't think he is coming through, let alone interested in me so I cut him off.

[Magnitude]

That's a good call. Considering how he seems to be acting, it's better to drop it rather than wait around hoping for something that might not happen. I'm sorry you had to deal with that though. That's rough.

[TheEvilJester]

Agreed with Magnitude. I have no sympathy for people like that. Just man-up and be honest from the start. If you are not interested, that is fine. Just be honest so the other person can move on. I can't stand people who are so damn full of themselves that they will just flat out ignore you when you try to contact them. Like they are so amazing I should be chasing them down. To HELL with people like that. You've made the effort, he can't be bothered to return the favor. So, yeah, leave him behind in your dust. If he finally shows back up with a reasonable excuse, MAYBE you consider giving him a shot anyway.... but I'm not even so sure I would if I were you.

But, agreed with your assumption that, at this point, he's probably not going to anyway. So, like I said, his loss not yours. You deserve a more attentive guy.

[nataly66687]

Yeah I cut him off, and if he does come back, I will not give him another chance, he had his and screwed it up so his loss. I will find someone else.

[TheEvilJester]

Believe me, in no time you will find somebody and he'll be a distant memory. Good for you for moving on. Good luck. I hope you find somebody great very soon.

[nataly66687]

Yes so do I, I am hoping so anyway.