I want to ask this lady out, but is it too soon?

[MosquitoSmasher]

I think this is the right place to ask this, but i am not sure because it's not exactly about dating yet, if it's ever going to come to that.

I had to go to veterinarian quite a bit lately for my dog and i noticed an assistent there, a very friendly and nice young lady. The thing is, we haven't spoken a whole lot. But i do think i've noticed things. I will now write what our conversations so far consisted of. Last tuesday i went there with my dog, she has a problem with her blatter. While i was waiting for the vet my dog had a small incident where she peed on the ground. The assistent walked towards us and cleaned it up right away, and i said sorry for this and she said it was ok. I then tried to make light of the situation in a friendly way by saying ''It's a good thing they didn't put a carpet here'' and she looked back with a smile and friendly said ''Wouldn't be very wise to put that in vet's place.''

As for real conversations with her that's about it. Looking back on it i could have talked some more with her, but i didn't. But i would be lying if i didn't say i am definitely interested in her, as soon as i saw her i liked her to be honest. As for things i've noticed....the way she looked at me when i arrived there and she told me to take a seat, the way she seems to behave when standing next to me, a bit shy i would say, or when the vet was talking t0 me i noticed her glancing at me. Basically she behaves very different towards me compared to other assistents or just women in general. The way she looked and smiled at me when she said gooddbye when i left....to me it feels like the interest could be mutual. Problem is, i've had similar experiences in my life and i turned out to be wrong on it and that the woman in question was just being friendly.

So........i just need a push in the right direction. We've spoken so briefly i'm not sure i should just flat out ask her out next time i go there and i already know i will be going there several times either tomorrow or else definitely next week for my dog. Life is too short to dwell on stuff though, so what would you do if you were in my shoes?

[melancholia]

Based off the information you gave in your post, it sounds like she's being professional and friendly, and not at all flirtatious. To be honest, most women do not appreciate being hit on or asked out at work, even if they do find that person attractive. It's not an appropriate place to be asking a woman out, as there are plenty of other environments where that is much more appropriate, and welcomed by women.

Your best bet is to keep the relationship strictly professional. She is there to do her job, not to entertain you or flirt with you. Just keep that in mind.

[Sunkiss]

I partially agree with melancholia. I think she is just doing her job and being professional with you. As you said....this has happened before where you were wrong about their intentions. don't read so much into things. The only advice I can really give you is actually attempt to have REAL conversations with her. There is no reason to ask her out because you guys talked about your dogs pee. My roommate ended up marrying someone she met because she was her nurse. You have to be tactful about it and slow. Just try being friendly and have normal conversation...IF she ACTUALLY gets interested in you, then maybe go for it. But not now.

[MosquitoSmasher]

Your comments are very much appreciated. I definitely realize this could all just be her being friendly towards a customer, but again if i compare that to how another assistent yesterday talked to me and helped me, it seemed completely different. But even this doesn't say a whole lot yet, we are all different people after all. I should have a conversation with her for starters, something i am not incredibly good at. Well...starting one with a good subject that is, because once there's a good subject i do think i am a decent conversationalist. If that's a word, haha. Next time i go there i could tell her about how my dog has been doing and i could ask if she has a dog or pets of her own,it's a start and i'll just have to see how that goes. I do firmly believe that there has to be a click...is the right word? Back in February 2005 i met a vet assistent (yup, coincedence huh, haha) and i was speechless. Back home i just decided to do something that i usually never would. I called the vet and asked for her, i then explained who i was and asked if she wanted to go for a walk with my dog sometime.This happened and within a day we were in love, relationship lasted three years. During that walk back then we talked about several things and we shared several of those interests, the click was definitely there. However i did not know this beforehand, before i called her and neither did she.

Anyway, the next time i have the chance to really talk to her i will make sure to pay attention to how she reacts and it goes. I definitely believe you can take quite a bit from that to see if it's just being friendly to a customer or more.

[CleanCut]

Your comments are very much appreciated. I definitely realize this could all just be her being friendly towards a customer, but again if i compare that to how another assistent yesterday talked to me and helped me, it seemed completely different. But even this doesn't say a whole lot yet, we are all different people after all. I should have a conversation with her for starters, something i am not incredibly good at. Well...starting one with a good subject that is, because once there's a good subject i do think i am a decent conversationalist. If that's a word, haha. Next time i go there i could tell her about how my dog has been doing and i could ask if she has a dog or pets of her own,it's a start and i'll just have to see how that goes. I do firmly believe that there has to be a click...is the right word? Back in February 2005 i met a vet assistent (yup, coincedence huh, haha) and i was speechless. Back home i just decided to do something that i usually never would. I called the vet and asked for her, i then explained who i was and asked if she wanted to go for a walk with my dog sometime.This happened and within a day we were in love, relationship lasted three years. During that walk back then we talked about several things and we shared several of those interests, the click was definitely there. However i did not know this beforehand, before i called her and neither did she.

Anyway, the next time i have the chance to really talk to her i will make sure to pay attention to how she reacts and it goes. I definitely believe you can take quite a bit from that to see if it's just being friendly to a customer or more.

Dude, if you see a girl you are interested in, just ask her out the worse thing she can do is say no thanks. One thing I have come to realize lately after being diagnosed with brain cancer recently and given an estimated max life expectancy of 13 years left at the age of 32, is that you never know how long you have on this earth. Looking back there are so many missed opportunities that I wish I would of taken chances on and didn't, especially with women. Just do it man, you got nothing to lose and you even have an excuse to talk to her already which is awesome. Ask her if she would like to have a drink with you one night soon, drinks are always my "go to first date" since it allows for relaxing conversation and you don't have to worry about trying to eat something during the conversation.

[MosquitoSmasher]

Jesus man.....first of all i am incredibly sorry to hear about that. I honestly can't imagine but i do understand very well what you're saying. My father passed away way too young and it all came very unexpectedly, but he did manage to do several great things for himself that made him more happy. I wish you all the best too man, again....no words.

As for your advice, you make a great point. And it's true i indeed can just strike up a conversation with her and there should be plenty to talk about. And then if the talk goes well i could just ask the question when it feels right. But i agree with what you said, no point in dwelling on things. I have to admit that it's really been way too long since i've been with a woman, like...really been with a woman.

[CleanCut]

Thanks for the kind words sir, I have come to terms with my situation and accept it as reality, although it hasn't been easy as you might imagine.

Yep, you got to blast any hesitation you might have out of your mind and go for it, with this girl and any other you like and get the opportunity to ask out. Top off your confidence and let it loose on her and you can even let us know how it goes if you want.

[Hooo!]

the worst thing that could happen is that she sais no.
So i dont see whats wrong if you openly commit that you are intrigued or interested and like to get to know her.

[MosquitoSmasher]

Small update....nothing much though. That being said* i am happy with myself because i decided to talk and not give up at the last moment. Which has been something i tended to do in the past.

Today i had to go there as well and our chat mostly consisted of talking about my dog and i asked her if she had dogs of her own. She told me she has a lot of animals because she lives with her parents on a farm. Due to her work and where it is busy quite a lot, i can't really talk for very long with her. My initial impression was that the interest may be mutual but i really am not sure. We did laugh today during our little chat...but chances are that she's just being friendly to a customer. I could have definitely asked her for a drink but it felt too out of the blue for me. Of course next time when i go there i could ask her how she's doing and from there on just ask the question.