I really like her....what to do?!?!?!

[Nathan1993]

I am in a sticky situation and I dont know what to do! Let me try and brief it as best as I can.

Ive known and been friends with this girl for close to 2 years. She is stunning and so beautiful and have always liked her but never said anything. Thing is she does have a boyfriend which is on edge and isnt happy in. Since December we have become extreamly close... she is a flirty person anyway and she got a little close to a friend I introduced her to, who she admitted was 'fit' a few months back, I know they do message every now and again even now. A few days ago she sent literally the longest text I have ever seen in my life (lol) going on about how she was in a bad way last year and since meeting me she has been smiling and happy all the time. She recently said she grew stronger feelings towards me and wanted to kiss me the other night we were out. I adore her and like her alot but....

1. She still has a boyfriend and even if it isnt doing smoothly she is still with him
2. I dont trust my own mate, who has a girlfriend himself, and what they talk about

We went on a night out last night. She just left her job and her work mates arranged a night out and she wanted me to go. She said her work mates wanted to meet me as she talks to them about me alot? I arranges a cake and flowers to be delivered to our table which she loved. She gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheek a few times. And her one work friend dropped little hints to me about me and her....but I still wonder if its her being flirty or not. What she texts other people like my mate. And her boyfriend

My insides hurt as I like her thst much and wouls give her the worls but i dont know what to do as we have been real good friends and although Id like more Im not sure if thats right.

What do i tell her? Do I take a step back or tell her how im feeling and if thats the case what do I say?

Thanks in advance for any help

[shrah25]

I am in a sticky situation and I dont know what to do! Let me try and brief it as best as I can.

Ive known and been friends with this girl for close to 2 years. She is stunning and so beautiful and have always liked her but never said anything. Thing is she does have a boyfriend which is on edge and isnt happy in. Since December we have become extreamly close... she is a flirty person anyway and she got a little close to a friend I introduced her to, who she admitted was 'fit' a few months back, I know they do message every now and again even now. A few days ago she sent literally the longest text I have ever seen in my life (lol) going on about how she was in a bad way last year and since meeting me she has been smiling and happy all the time. She recently said she grew stronger feelings towards me and wanted to kiss me the other night we were out. I adore her and like her alot but....

1. She still has a boyfriend and even if it isnt doing smoothly she is still with him
2. I dont trust my own mate, who has a girlfriend himself, and what they talk about

We went on a night out last night. She just left her job and her work mates arranged a night out and she wanted me to go. She said her work mates wanted to meet me as she talks to them about me alot? I arranges a cake and flowers to be delivered to our table which she loved. She gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheek a few times. And her one work friend dropped little hints to me about me and her....but I still wonder if its her being flirty or not. What she texts other people like my mate. And her boyfriend

My insides hurt as I like her thst much and wouls give her the worls but i dont know what to do as we have been real good friends and although Id like more Im not sure if thats right.

What do i tell her? Do I take a step back or tell her how im feeling and if thats the case what do I say?

Thanks in advance for any help

Hi There

Wow, this seems like a situation I was in about 15 years ago!
There are a couple of interesting points here.
1) She's in a relationship
2) She's flirty

Now sometimes some women (and men) really crave the attention of some guys and in turn, the really nice guys tend to get really hooked into this situation. Sadly, most of them tend to fail on thier quest to getting romantically involved with that particular woman. Some do, but a lot dont hence the saying "nice guys finish last".

The fact that she's flirty does ring a few alarm bells because it suggests to me that on some level, she may be behaving in similar ways with other guys. Maybe not to the same extent as you because it's clear that she does care about you or else she wouldn't have spoken to her work mates about you.

Now I would be doing you a disservice by saying that you should pursue her or you shouldn't mainly cause I don't know either of you at all.

But the most important thing here is that you don't get hooked into the superficial nature of her. Make a conscious effort to truly understand her, her positive traits, her negative traits, her wounds etc because a relationship is not all about the good stuff - it's also about embracing the other parts of her and loving her unconditionally for all of it.

Hope all that makes sense?

[dollhouse]

Great advice from [MENTION=85291]shrah25[/MENTION] ..welcome to the forums.

I think she needs to break up with her bf before getting involved with another man, that is only the respectful way to go about things, don't two time, because I always think what one does with you, they can easily turn around and do it right back to you also.... Plus you don't want to be that type of guy either.

Tell her to let you know when she actually breaks up with her bf because you have a keen interest in her and would like to properly take her out one day and see where both your feelings can go.

[shrah25]

Spot on [MENTION=78654]dollhouse[/MENTION]. Even though you may like her [MENTION=85321]Nathan1993[/MENTION] you have to make sure that you uphold your values and integrity. If you just jump in there whilst she's with someone else, you are effectively telling her that its ok to hook up with other guys whilst she's in a relationship.

You don't want to be that guy. Come across as the guy who doesn't need to be in a relationship but chooses to be a relationship with her - but only when she displays the values and integrity that you wish to see in a woman.

Cheers

[Hooo!]

so i get this right:
1) girl you have a crush on tells you she is not happy in her current relationship and that she wants you
2) you dont know what to do?