What to do?

[lilmissmuffett]

I have a boyfriend for 6 years now. He's my first boyfriend. All these time, my bf and I are so comfortable with each other, we can fart in each others faces and we actually don't mind.

Last 3-4 weeks, I saw this friend whom I've known waaay before my BF. We see each other once or twice a year just to catch up on things. We did our "yearly catch up" 3-4 weeks ago. We did the usual, ate lunch then he went to a meeting then I went home.

Then it went down spiral. To make my story short, we had lunch then dinner again in the next few days then we chat almost everyday.

I'm starting to realize that I like him. I like him for the reasons that he's goal oriented, determined, he knows what he wants in life which are the characteristics that I don't see with my bf. I'm starting to question myself if I have a future with my bf.

Then last weekend, something happened between us. Not full on sex but 'almost' sex. Details are unimportant but it actually felt nice and good and familiar. It's my first time being intimate with another person aside from my bf. It was weird but it was familiar and I was happy.

I know this is now full on cheating. I don't like myself for it. I know I should come clean soon. The truth is, I'm willing to throw my 6 yr relationship away for this guy.

I'm so confused right now and this may reflect in my writing. I can't stop thinking about the guy. Whenever I close my eyes, I see him. I can feel him touching me.

The thing is I don't know what I am to him.

Thoughts, anyone?

[AdminOnline]

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[GLYC]

Well, the guy you're with is being disrespected. The guy you're dating, is cool with doing things like that with somebody he knows is in a committed relationship. And you said it yourself, you're cheating which means loyalty doesn't mean crap to you.

What you should have done is been respectful, ended things with your boyfriend since you don't feel a strong connection for him so that he can move on and find someone else. Then you could have contacted this guy, done whatever, etc.

At this point, may as well end it with him. Have fun with this guy, but don't be surprised if one day he cheats on you.
My interpretation is that real respectful (not saying he doesnt have any other good qualities) men don't do things with other men's women. It's not cool in my book.
But that's my viewpoint.

And it's hard to say what you are to this new guy. He's obviously attracted to you in some way, at least sexually. Probably romantically, but you havent given too many details.

[Snow White]

I am not going to be judgemental or try to make you feel bad about yourself. I don't know how old you are. Six years is a good investment of your life, but the fact that you are feeling a strong attraction to another is something to take seriously. What if this guy is not interested in starting a relationship with you? Would you still be willing to end your 6 year relationship? If you do not know what you are to him, then you need to find out. As a mature woman I would tell you this: if after six years with someone and you have not made a serious commitment to each other and now you are feeling things for another and feeling your bf is lacking goals for the future, for the fairness and respect of your bf, you must begin to seriously think about what it truly is you want in a partner.

[nikosantos]

Hey, I understand your situation and you know what the point where you and your boyfriend are too comfortable to each other is a very dangerous part of relationship. It is where most of the relationships fall apart why? because they stop growing together. they stop exploring new things together, but it doesn't mean you need to feel guilty i am not saying what you did is wrong but the context of wrong and right is no longer valid in this kind of situation . its a matter of your own growth now. and it also happens to a lot of people not just you. you need to ask yourself am i happy? will i grow up with this guy? well if it will help you to become a better person then go. but this is not simple case you have to talk with your boyfriend first there are many things you need to understand. if you are still confuse you can send me a pm and i will be glad to help you