Is he still into his ex?

[JennaB]

I was set up with my friends SO’s buddy. We met about 1.5 months ago. The issue is, upon finding out, my friend told me he likes about every other picture his ex has posted. They broke up in early October. I do know she broke up with him and shortly tried to reconcile, he said no, but then later told her he was struggling with the breakup and she said she was too. Also, they had also discussed marriage.

It wasn’t until recently that my friend’s SO really spilled the beans about their breakup- none of which my friend knew prior to setting me up. So apparently after he turned her away he was blowing up her phone saying stuff like the breakup really messed with him, how he wanted to stay but couldn’t. Then a little later the I’m having a hard time message followed. Also, my friend is under the impression that he tried to make her jealous (I don’t agree). He snapped a video of his food and then showed the girl he was on a date then posted it on social media. This was a few weeks after telling her that he was struggling. Not quite sure showing off your date on social media means you're trying to make someone jealous though.

She said she was hurt but loved him enough to be happy for him to be moving on. He replied with a “?”, and she said I’m referring to your video that you posted. He told her how he loved her very much but they just argued a lot. Then sent her another message saying it’s not wise to give out information about what may or may not be going on his dating life. She said she wasn’t asking but wished him all the best. He then liked her picture a few days later and I was told he was looking at her social media. This happened in November. He’s still liking her stuff now.

The anniversary of his mother’s death was this past weekend. I was with him and he had his messages up and I saw he told her, “thanks for the card”. So apparently she sent him some sympathy card or something. I mean if he was still interested in her he would’ve said more than thanks for the card right?

[peace.fairy]

it's impossible to answer your question from what you've said. I wouldn't read too much into that he only said 'thank's for the card' and nothing more. I mean it wasn't the happiest occasion and he probably wasn't thinking of much else at that time. And it's no indicator about how he feels about her.

Another thing: you've only met him 1,5 month ago. How many times have you seen each other? Are you in a relationship now or just seeing each other? Either way - just ask him. I don't mean straight away 'are you still into your ex' but just maybe start talking about it ask how he feels in general about relationships and stuff...and see how he's talking.

A bit of a red flag is him liking all of her pictures on social media. I'd say it might be an indicator of him still liking her. But if I understood correctly - they broke up in October and you met him 1,5 month ago - so it was what like one month after his break up? And if they have discussed marriage, probably the relationship lasted for a while... I'd say that's too early to start a new relationship after being hurt by someone. So wether he still loves her or not - it's very unlikely in either way that he is over her and their break up and is ready to start something new. My advice would be to let him be and move on. Stay in touch, maybe when he's over her, you might start something, but definitely not now.

[JennaB]

it's impossible to answer your question from what you've said. I wouldn't read too much into that he only said 'thank's for the card' and nothing more. I mean it wasn't the happiest occasion and he probably wasn't thinking of much else at that time. And it's no indicator about how he feels about her.

Another thing: you've only met him 1,5 month ago. How many times have you seen each other? Are you in a relationship now or just seeing each other? Either way - just ask him. I don't mean straight away 'are you still into your ex' but just maybe start talking about it ask how he feels in general about relationships and stuff...and see how he's talking.

A bit of a red flag is him liking all of her pictures on social media. I'd say it might be an indicator of him still liking her. But if I understood correctly - they broke up in October and you met him 1,5 month ago - so it was what like one month after his break up? And if they have discussed marriage, probably the relationship lasted for a while... I'd say that's too early to start a new relationship after being hurt by someone. So wether he still loves her or not - it's very unlikely in either way that he is over her and their break up and is ready to start something new. My advice would be to let him be and move on. Stay in touch, maybe when he's over her, you might start something, but definitely not now.

I forgot to add she broke up with him and tried to reconcile a week later. He said he was happy and had moved on, but then he sent her about 6 or 7 messages the night he turned her away. He was saying how her breaking up with him really messed with his head and how he wanted to stay but felt like he couldn't.

[Hooo!]

What do you want?