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Thread: Missing my ex-wife, whom I still love, and I want her back.

  1. #1
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    Missing my ex-wife, whom I still love, and I want her back.

    A year ago, my wife unilaterally divorced me after just 15 months of marriage. I still love her and miss her. Not only did I lose my wife, but I also lost a family, because she had 2 daughters who are about the same age as my daughter. This has been very traumatic for my daughter, who loved her stepsisters and played with them all the time. I cannot even think of being with another woman because of my feelings for my ex-wife. It's probably unrealistic that she would ever want to reconcile. In fact, I ran into her a few months ago and she said, "I have moved on, and we are now on separate journeys." But my journey hasn't changed, in the sense that I still love her. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her and think of all the good times we had as a couple. I've even started compiling a list of fond memories and am wondering if I should send it to her. I've been in counseling but it hasn't helped. One counselor told me that women are like trains, and that after one train leaves the station, another one comes along. I cannot think of my ex-wife in that way. I thought we were soulmates and would be together forever. The only analogy I can make to trains is that I'm a "train wreck" after losing the woman I loved and a family that both my daughter and I loved. I would welcome any advice.

  2. #2
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    I would imagine your hurting pretty bad. The really bad news is that she has already told you point blank that she has moved on. As tough as it may be I think your best route is to continue
    the counseling and try your best to move on. The sooner you can do that the sooner you will feel better. The fond memories thing is a really really bad idea as it will subject you to more
    rejection....don't do it.

  3. #3
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    I cant imagine your state to be honest but by the way you explain it , it sure seem to hurt.
    What I think you should do is first of all try to relax, drink some beer , go on vacation, clear your mind.
    After that think why it happened and most important STAY CLOSE TO YOUR DAUGHTER!
    Families break, one of my co-workers in the same state, but he have a constant day to go and see his girl no matter what.
    Do the same, what happened between you and your wife shouldn't affect your relationship with your daughter.
    Keep your head up and Fight for what you believe!
    If I know something from my experience in life is that there is nothing you cant achieve if you learn , try hard enough and try with different approaches if one doesn't work.

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    What is there's a remote chance she still has feelings for me?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Married View Post
    I would imagine your hurting pretty bad. The really bad news is that she has already told you point blank that she has moved on. As tough as it may be I think your best route is to continue
    the counseling and try your best to move on. The sooner you can do that the sooner you will feel better. The fond memories thing is a really really bad idea as it will subject you to more
    rejection....don't do it.
    ====

    Thank you for your response. The fear of more rejection is the only reason I haven't sent her my lengthy list of exquisite memories from our relationship. But then I wonder, what if there is a remote chance that she still has feelings for me, and is waiting for me to "make the first move" toward reconciliation? Yes, she did tell me several months ago that she has moved on, but if I still have such strong feelings and fond memories after this long, isn't there a chance that she would as well? Those are questions I cannot answer. I realize I'm not being logical or rational about this, but the last year has been hell for me, trying to live without her. I miss her every day.

  5. #5
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    Don't set yourself up for more of the same. Your already crushed..your only going to start back at ground zero all over again.
    You need to try your best to move on.

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