You're not a red flag to men with confidence and who understand the skills required for a healthy relationship. But since you waited so long to get into relationships that might be a red flag for the average guy who still hasn't found his confidence. Personally, I like women who can take care of themselves, and at least you had fun in your younger years and got that over and done with, so perhaps you really would be able to commit and actually have a healthy relationship.
To find a man you must illustrate clearly, and by past results, that you provide value to the relationship. You have value if:
- If you can pay half the bills and dates.
- If you can plan ahead 40 years and execute that plan successfully you have value.
- If you understand relationship psychology and what a healthy relationship really is. You will need a big education in this though.
- If you can talk calmly like an adult about anything at all without yelling, screaming, and making personal attacks. Because in a relationship, you WILL need to talk about some touchy things.
- If you have SOME retirement fund already. If you just wasted 18 years on partying, that is a self-centered person no one wants for anything serious.
- That you have an emergency fund. There WILL be emergencies and you must show that you are prepared.
- That you have no credit card or debt besides a house or car. This shows good money management which is important to me.
I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
(Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)