What should I do????? Let her go?

[One in need]

Dating for 2 1/2 years I'm in California she is in Nevada. Had a few breakups she has major issues with me and my ex wife being compatible we have kids. In March of 2017 we had a short breakup like a week. We were talking and texting the next day after the break up mostly still Arguing which turned to when I was going to drive to see her then got back together. I asked back then if anyone hit her up, she said a guy she worked for texted her telling her he was divorced from his wife she told him she and I broke up. She told me that was it. Fast forward to January 2018, I'm on her computer looking for a certain pic of us and find a video sent by this guy, he was jacking off full cum shot etc...you get it. In the same file was videos of her doing the same thing with a dildo etc...obviously sent to him. Called her out she lied saying he or she didn't send anything which then went to He sent video then She did but she didn't remember what she sent etc... She said this happened over a TWO day period during the "break up" Which wasn't really a break up.. I'm petty messed up over all this as doesn't go down that way theses days does it? I asked if they slept together she said no and had stuck to that for two months... Not sure i believe that at all... He is a total freak as she is too, so I'm not convinced. I feel she is still lying so Im about to break it off... Any thoughts? Opinions. Oh and then she tells me just the other day that the videos that were sent were some of the ones shade and sent to me... . She said she did not make them specifically for him.. What do you think I should do? She also was sexting him for that time as well, I told her I saw conversation, she said it was non stop for the two days...advice?

[TheEvilJester]

I personally didn't need the graphic description, thank you. LOL! But, to be honest I am with you here. You two were broken up for a week and THAT quickly she was exchanging disgusting videos with a guy? I mean, if you were fully broken up, then I guess she is free to do what she wants and it technically isn't wrong. Two problems, though. A) I personally wouldn't want to be with somebody anyway who could move on THAT quickly. B) It sounds like you say your break-up wasn't really official. Like it was maybe more just a heated argument and a bit of a break/breather. So, if that is the case, then what she did is cheating.

On a side, personal note, to be honest with you, a gal that would send/want to receive videos like that isn't really my type personally anyway. At least unless MAYBE if it had been with somebody with whom they are in a serious relationship and not just some random guy, essentially. But, to me personally, I'd want a woman who would consider something like that to be vulgar. That doesn't mean I am right for feeling that way or she is wrong that she doesn't. I'm just saying, that's my personal feeling. I'd want somebody whose values/morals (including as it relates to sexuality) match my own close enough... and that certainly would NOT.

Based on your reaction, it sounds like you align more towards my side of thinking than you do hers. If so, that could honestly be enough of a sign that you are probably better off without her. If you are THAT different sexually it is rare that can work.

Good luck to you either way.

[One in need]

Thank you. I don't mind fun stuff between her and I,
but don't then send to a man she worked for if in fact it we only two days, which I believe they had a history and she is lying. I do this believe it was a two day deal at all, but she is sticking go to that story lime stone

[bunnyhabit]

you and her are not compatible. you are laid back conservative and she is a girls gone wild type. she is also a very chronic liar. not worth investing your time in if you are looking for a monogamous relationship. she will bounce from guy to guy forever.

[TheEvilJester]

you and her are not compatible. you are laid back conservative and she is a girls gone wild type.

That's actually a really good way to put it. I think it also sums up really well what I was trying to say. I like that way of phrasing it. Because there is absolutely nothing wrong with her if she is the "girls gone wild" type.... but that's exactly the type of gal I'd personally have zero interest in myself.

It's not like I expect a gal I'm with to have to be a prude. LOL! I just think sex and sexuality really should have their proper time and place and not be flashed all over the damn place. It's not something to be ashamed of, but it's also something that shouldn't be flaunted around like you need the world to know all about it.

I myself, in that aspect, could very much be described as laid back and conservative. It wouldn't bother me if I had a gal who was a little more adventurous than me in that regard.... but if she was completely balls to the wall into anything and everything, that would probably not be compatible with me. Doesn't make me wrong or her wrong, we just aren't compatible.

Sounds like that may be the case with you. I mean, I could just be misinterpreting, but it kind of sounded like she was a little more "liberated" in that regard than you completely feel comfortable with yourself. But, again, I do agree that her apparent habit for lying is really an even bigger problem. How exactly are you supposed to expect you can trust her when she cheats on you (and even though it may have been a break, if it wasn't a full on official "It is over" kind of break-up, then what she did was cheating) and then is almost certainly lying about it on top of that?

You have to do what is right for you.... but I personally would leave and not look back.

Good luck to you.