Can only orgasm by myself....

[cheazypeaz]

you sound like all you want in sex is your own personal pleasure, and not his.. maybe im wrong though?

[updraft]

Yes, I know this can be fairly common for women...but...It would be nice to actually have an orgasm while having sex.
..

rent a porn and have him shave well before doing oral on you.....makes all the difference.

[Ellynn]

you sound like all you want in sex is your own personal pleasure, and not his.. maybe im wrong though?

I think she wants the guy to have pleasure......and usually they probably do. But it does get fustrating when a girl (like myself) is having sex....having a good time....and everythings good.....except you just can't "get there" and finish.

Whats wrong with a woman wanting pleasure as well?

[BDRAS]

If you just cant get there, theres something lacking emotionally.

[Ellynn]

If you just cant get there, theres something lacking emotionally.

Not necessarily.... Sometimes a girl just can't get there.....whether shes totally into the guy or not.

[BDRAS]

im talking from personal experience here -
Its your frame of mind - you can be as into a guy as you want, but if your not convinced you can cum, your much less likely to succeed.
Stick him on his back and take control, imagine him blowing a hot load inside you and you contracting around his huge cawk. just think of stuff which really turns you on and imagine yourself contracting around him, even give yourself a starter by tightening yourself around him. Shift so your clit is against his abdomen and his head against your g-spot then close your eyes, imagine and grind. Tell yourself your about to cum, and you will. Its a huge climax and a slow one, just dont give up and never let yourself think (even in the back of your mind, the uncontrolled bit) "i'm not really gonna make it"

The first time I came during sex was after a few days without, and we worked up to it for ages and ages, in the end i was totally impassionated. I got into a rythem that started to feel really good, I closed my eyes and imagined her pussy tightening around me and then all of a sudden something clicked in my brain and literaly said "holy f.uck, im going to cum" - it was another 5 mins before my climax hit the roof but when it did it rocked my world harder than I ever imagined possible. I started to shake and tremble and I just lost my nut. Its still the most incredible experience I have ever had.

Nowadays if i need to speed it up I can hold my breath, which really helps but I make kinda funny sounds - the trick to it is to get into a really great rythem, then hold your breath and DONT LET GO. It speeds my climax up from 5-10mins to 1-2mins. And I can stay under water for ages nowadays. Its a proven medical fact that depriving your body of oxygen speeds up an orgasm. try it.

[BDRAS]

and just to clarify - sex lasts 30+mins but the climax builds up for 5-10mins.

[Elven Lied]

Yes, I know this can be fairly common for women...but...It would be nice to actually have an orgasm while having sex.

I don't find that I'm dissatisfied with sex, although I don't orgasm...it's still fun for me, and I always feel pleased......but I know there's that extra "kick" with an orgasm......

It's more than just an extra "kick". Orgasms are funny. Sometimes I have mindblowing orgasms, sometimes I have so so orgasms, and sometimes I can't really feel myself having one at all, even though I am, and I do come.

I will tell you this though. Orgasms are not the goal of sex. They're really not. Think of them as a really big bonus. There are alot of times where I have sex but don't really come close to an orgasm at all. I still enjoy sex just as much, and it still feels amazing. I wouldn't though if I kept on thinking that I "must" have an orgasm to say that I enjoy sex. That's really not it at all.

I don't expect anyone to hit the right spots at the right time, in the same way that I do by myself, and give me just as much or even a more intense orgasm than what I give myself.

But sex is phychological. I enjoy it for alot of reasons. Mostly because it's with someone whom i'm very much in love with, then, because I know they care about me, and the feeling that we share. I never could enjoy casual sex, or sex with anyone for that matter that I didn't share an deep emotional bond with. It's hard to explain, and maybe you don't work the same way, but that's just me.

[Jeblina]

I will tell you this though. Orgasms are not the goal of sex. They're really not. Think of them as a really big bonus. There are alot of times where I have sex but don't really come close to an orgasm at all. I still enjoy sex just as much, and it still feels amazing. I wouldn't though if I kept on thinking that I "must" have an orgasm to say that I enjoy sex. That's really not it at all.

I don't expect anyone to hit the right spots at the right time, in the same way that I do by myself, and give me just as much or even a more intense orgasm than what I give myself.

This is exactly how I feel....I'm not saying that I MUST have an orgasm every single time I have sex.....but once in a while would be nice......like I said before, although I'm not having orgasms, I never feel like I haven't been "satisfied".....

Thanks for your input...

[Ellynn]

and just to clarify - sex lasts 30+mins but the climax builds up for 5-10mins.

Yes, and I've been there and done that.....w/ one of my ex's. But Im just saying....no matter how hard you concentrate and get into the mode(AS A GIRL) sometimes it just doesn't happen. Im telling myself I wanna.....I even have the dirty talk going......(which is a turn on btw) and yet sometimes cant just get there.....

Oh well..I will try your theory.....yet again. Althought it is different somewhat for a guy then it is for a girl....

[BDRAS]

what is it with chicks and dirty talk? In "the moment" i could say anything and my girl looses the plot - like "i want to touch your little brother" - even that seems to turn her on... wtf?

[Tone]

LoL yeah, I was with a girl once who was really kinda shy and nice and sweet when you first met her... but man she turned into an animal in the sack and would say the dirtiest things... was so hot...

[MidnightRose]

Yes, I know this can be fairly common for women...but...It would be nice to actually have an orgasm while having sex.

Even with my ex...who I was very comfortable with, the only way that I could have an orgasm while I was with him was if I did clitoral stimulation on myself....I tried letting him do it, and telling him HOW I liked it done, but he just couldn't get it right....either he ended up being too rough, or too soft.....it was frustrating.....and he even got to the point where he was annoyed that I was (in his terms) masturbating during sex.

I don't find that I'm dissatisfied with sex, although I don't orgasm...it's still fun for me, and I always feel pleased......but I know there's that extra "kick" with an orgasm......

I guess I'm just wondering if any of the ladies out there have had this problem and found any ways to overcome it......

i have the same problem i cant cum unless i stimulate my clit. i read in a magazine that 8% of women cant orgasim unless they get clitoral stimulation. so you are normal and i have to do the same things that you do unless my boyfriend is eating me out then all i have to do is relax lay back and cum you should try it. i love it cause i dont have to do the work to stimulate myself and it makes him feel better that he gave me an orgasim.

[Ellynn]

i have the same problem i cant cum unless i stimulate my clit. i read in a magazine that 8% of women cant orgasim unless they get clitoral stimulation. so you are normal and i have to do the same things that you do unless my boyfriend is eating me out then all i have to do is relax lay back and cum you should try it. i love it cause i dont have to do the work to stimulate myself and it makes him feel better that he gave me an orgasim.

Well then your bf knows what he is doing obviously......sigh...must be nice!

[Junsui]

i have the same problem i cant cum unless i stimulate my clit. i read in a magazine that 8% of women cant orgasim unless they get clitoral stimulation.

That percentage looks off, I think it's too low.