Do I have the right?

[HolyNorth]

Well recently, I started dating a girl. She has many friends that she has known for many years, some since she was a child. A few of her friends never really liked me, and once I started dating her began to hate me (I wish to not say why). She backed me up and ended the relationship with her friends, and began losing most of her friends in a huge mess. I don't feel that I have the right to enter her life, in a matter of weeks, and ruin her frienship with people that she has known for many years.

Should I just backout now or should I stay out of her business?

[Debunkt]

**** that. Stay with her. Who the hell wants friends that are going to stop being your friend just because of who you date? Those aren't friends. Date her. You'll probably be better for her than those flakes.

[updraft]

There has to be a good reason why they dislike you....it would help us here if you could tell us why...

[TAVS]

Backout. And this is the Internet, it's anonymous. If you want real help, tell us everything we need to know

[HolyNorth]

Well I cheated on my previous girlfriend. Luckily the girl I am dating now has looked past that and given me a chance.

[TAVS]

See, now was that so hard? I always hate to see people ditch friends because they're dating someone new. Thats regardless of if they like the person or not, friends should stay friends. This is especially true for young people who will most likely be out of the relationship in a relatively short period.

[HolyNorth]

So you think I should just backout now? Before we get any farther?



**** that. Stay with her. Who the hell wants friends that are going to stop being your friend just because of who you date? Those aren't friends. Date her. You'll probably be better for her than those flakes.

No no no, she ended the relationship with her friends, because they didn't like me.

[TAVS]

I think you should ask her. Express the situation to her and let her know you feel bad about her turning her back on her friends. Offer her an 'out' and see if she takes it. If she wants to stay with you, even when you offer to back out, then that's her call. How does that sound??

[shh!]

You have a history of not being such a great catch. Her friends were correct in worrying about her judgement in dating you. I'd say her friends were looking out for her best interests. I hate when women dump friends who really care about what sort of guys she dates. She must be a very needy woman.

[HolyNorth]

Well I confronted her once that she didn't need to be turning her back on her friends, and she simply told me that it wasn't my fault and changed the subject.

I don't think that it's too late to have a friend relationship, I will take your advice and offer her an 'out.'



You have a history of not being such a great catch. Her friends were correct in worrying about her judgement in dating you. I'd say her friends were looking out for her best interests. I hate when women dump friends who really care about what sort of guys she dates. She must be a very needy woman.


Yes, I 100% agree with you. I am very lucky for a girl to even think twice about dating me. Just wanted to make sure I wasn't alone on my opinion.

[Debunkt]

hehe. sorry I misunderstood.

[shh!]

She will not dump you for her friends. She obviously is very needy of male attention, and since she has no more friends, she certainly isn't going to get rid of you now. The question you should be asking yourself is why you would want to date someone who is so willing to lose such long-standing friends who offer her what you willingly concede is good advice, and don't go letting your ego tell you that it is because you are such a remarkable catch.

I don't mean to sound judgemental about your past, by the way, as I realize people can make mistakes and truly regret them. I am simply being pragmatic.

[Ellynn]

Shh has a point. I have had friends too who ditched everyone else just to be with their man........and then when the relationship ended....they regretted it and tried being friends with all of us again.....even though SHE blew us off in the first place....

Honestly I would not break off my friendship w/ people in order to stop them from dating someone...... I am a true friend...even if I dislike the guy they are dating. Yes, her friends are probably looking out for her best interest..
But if it were the opposite way around....would you ditch all of your friends even if they disliked her?

[Sami09]

I understand what your gf going though because i went though that with my group of friends. They wrote my bf a letter just making fun of him i guess they really truly hate him. Yet one of them try to get him. Also my best friend went though the same thing too they did like her man cause he didnt talk enough. and they called her a slut and a ho and said she was getting it on with my bf which is bull shitter she is like a sister too me. i do understand what you and your going are feeling maybe in time you can make peace maybe not. good luck

Well recently, I started dating a girl. She has many friends that she has known for many years, some since she was a child. A few of her friends never really liked me, and once I started dating her began to hate me (I wish to not say why). She backed me up and ended the relationship with her friends, and began losing most of her friends in a huge mess. I don't feel that I have the right to enter her life, in a matter of weeks, and ruin her frienship with people that she has known for many years.

Should I just backout now or should I stay out of her business?