I had an affair

[lovestruck]

These are all things to consider before cheating. Of course, most people don't.

you act as if most couples are faithful. I can say 7 out of 10 friends have or are cheating on their mates, and I'm not trying to follow some trend. I'm also not comparing my relationship with others. And if you can't tell, I'm trying to be as considerate as I can. I mean, If I wasn't I would've done this along time ago, packed up my things and just left. I'm not that harsh. After all these years would I have put everyone elses needs before mine if I wasn't being considerate? Do you think I'd be goin out of my fuk** mind trying to figure out what would make me happy because I don't know what would after so long? If that's not consideration.. I don't know what is.

[Tone]

I'm also not comparing my relationship with others.

Actually that's exactly what you're doing when you say:

you act as if most couples are faithful. I can say 7 out of 10 friends have or are cheating on their mates, and I'm not trying to follow some trend.

Let me ask you somethin, so what do YOU think is the right thing to do here? You sit here and tell us you're so considerate, when you started the thread basically saying "Yeah, I cheated, yeah I liked it, no I didn't feel any guilt, yes I want to do it again."

I mean which one are we suppose to believe here?

[Junsui]

lol oh calm down, I don't think all couples are faithful. I believe they all SHOULD be, I never thought they all actually are. That's why I said these things should be considered, but most often aren't. I don't doubt you're going out of your mind about this. I'm not out to make you look like a bad person and I'm not out to make it look like it was ok and everything will be alright. The consequences of our decisions can be harsh. I feel sorry you're having to go through this, but I know we only put ourselves in these situations.

[Tone]

You made your bed, now you have to lay in it.

[FrenchMaid]

From my experience you should tell him, secret are not good, you may not feel guilty now, but you will one day...and I am sure that he will feel more hurt if he heard this by someone else then you. If you tell him at least he will appreciate that you are honest with him! Well regarding that you had a hard life at a very young age... sorry to heard that but i did too. I know what its like!!! I lost my dad I was 11, he died at 35 from cancer, then I had to take care of my self because my mom went to a severa depression then I end up pregnant I was 17, the guy dump me and I raise my child alone, I could have an abourtion but i did not! Now me too I had my child hood cut very short, I had to grow up very fast and learn that life is more then playing... a lots of responsabilities you have to take and when you are in those situations you actually have to take them pretty fast....BUT...never stop me of when I make mistake, I am honest about them and I assume the responsability of my action and somethime I believe I have too much patience and take too much...
All this for saying that you made a mistake and I think that you even that its the first time you should pay respect to your men/husband/bf what ever he is...he deserve it..
We all make mistake and usely people learn from them...now its your to decide... if in the futur you will learn from your mistake or you will continu to keep them in a deep space where one day they can come up and show up in your face....
Think about that...

Frenchie

[lovestruck]

yes frenchmaid.. i know everyone has their own stories to tell, but again.. I'm not prepared to just suck everything up and take what life throws at me. yes I also did make my own bed.. and that's whats fukin makin me so angry! I made probably the biggest mistake I'll ever make in my life.. I didn't use protection. and I'm dealing with it.I may be confused right now. I really don't know what I want to do. I don't even know which part of what I did was wrong or right.
which one are you supposed to believe? Whatever you choose to. We all have our good and bad sides. I'm not saying that I never did one good thing for myslef through all the years I was putting others before me, I did. If I didn't I'd probably be dead by now. Am I considerate? YES. Did I enjoy that 1 day of no consideration, no obligation, no responsibility? YES, because for the first time in years.. I felt happy. I felt free.

[Junsui]

You didn't use protection when you cheated? I just didn't know if that's what you were refering to.

[lovestruck]

You didn't use protection when you cheated? I just didn't know if that's what you were refering to.

OMG! I DID! I didn't use protection the day my child was conceived!!

[Junsui]

ok lol, that's why I asked. I didn't know. Just relax.

[lovestruck]

ok lol, that's why I asked. I didn't know. Just relax.

sorry. I don't mean to come off all naggy. I'm just realllyyyyyyy frustrated. thanks for the advice. It helped alot. You have no idea how much! I'm gonna go 4 tday.. gonna head home. cya guys tomorrow.

[Tone]

Drive safe.

[Junsui]

Bye bye! Good luck with everything and be safe.

[Rosebud]

well yes you didn't use protection and you got pregnant. And yes, your life has taken a differnet turn now and you are forced to grow up and deal with all kinds of different situations. yes, this can be hard, and yes it very much sounds like your dealing with post pardom depression. BUT, in no way does this make it okay to do what you have done. I think you are slowly realizing this and starting to feel some remorse. But telling your bf the truth will not make thigns worse, it will make you a better person for being honest and facing the consequences of your actions. How are you ever going to learn if you can't face what you have done? I understand your frustrated and your struggling with all kinds of emotions, I know how it feels to have a baby when your not ready but you cannot look at your child as the biggest mistake of your life. if you do, you will resent your child the rest of your life and I don't think you want that.

I'm not saying your a bad person I'm saying you made some wrong choices when you were confronted with a life altering decision. But I do think for you to learn who you are and what you want, you have to face the bed you have made for yourself. With you only being twenty you have a long hard road ahead of you and many things will happen that you will think you can't handle but after you get past them and move on to the next, you will feel better about yourself for getting throug those hard times. If you do not stand up and confront the issues you have and be honest, similar situations will keep happening to you until you take action and learn from them.

[carpflounder]

Am I considerate? YES. Did I enjoy that 1 day of no consideration, no obligation, no responsibility? YES, because for the first time in years.. I felt happy. I felt free.

Your at a crossroads here. You have cheated once..you have tasted this seductive and improper behaviour...you can make the choice to never do it again.

Or you can choose to go wild and run the risk of messing everything up...I think your situation is loaded considering that you have an 8 month old baby.

Remember with life..there are consequences for the choices that you make..remember that you heard this..... when you get caught.

[Promiscuity]

You shouldn't have to sacrifice who you are just because somebody else has a problem with it.